There was a time when you woke up, scratched your head, looked up the hall or to the next room, and your mom or dad was right there asking you "You hungry"? "What you doing today"? " How much you need"?
Then as if it crept up on you like a nasty winter cold....you are grown and expected to get it together FAST! Questions that come now are more like "When are you getting your own place?" "When are you going to get a job?" "The bills are due"? and then you find yourself asking someone else "How much THEY need"?
Adulthood creeps up and sticks on you like adhesive. This can be a beautiful, wonderful, liberating time OR it can be very stressful, depressing and upsetting if you haven't prepared yourself for it. I always give thanks everyday for my childhood and my family. My father and mother pushed me and stayed on top of me and my education like it was their only duty in life. In addition to having their constant motivation, my Aunts and my NANA were a constant reinforcement and motivation for me, telling me to be the best at EVERYTHING I did and telling me how great I was always!
This is extremely important for a child. I know so many young people who are turning into adulthood and who are IN adulthood and don't know what to do. They don't know where to turn, how to navigate in life because they never were encouraged by their family, or anyone for that matter, on how important it is that you lay a foundation for your future that is steadily approach fast!
I have been in school now for 22 years...and just recently I have been contemplating getting my PhD., because WHY NOT! I have not always been a FAN of going to school...and I must admit I did not always go for the best reasons. I am a social bug and during high school most of the time I looked forward to going everyday just to take my cozy spot with the rest of my friends who sat at the top of the social hierarchy. We came to school to dress, flaunt our perfectly framed bodies and talk talk talk. Passing classes was just something we decided to add on to the show. Because afterall, High School was a show!
It is not until now as I sit in my Masters program class that I give thanks a thousand times over for the endless nights my father sat up with me talking and drilling the importance of getting my education. He would tell me how people can strip me of alot of things but no one can EVER EVER take away the knowledge that I learn and acquire in my lifetime. How my knowledge will always set me apart from the rest, and my persistent and dedication to WANT to always push myself will take me far. He used to tell me "Yes Dee, looking good will get you in the door, and having some personality will get you further..but once you get there you have to sustain yourself..." Thank you DADDY! How many times have I LIVED those words and they have came true.
My point is this. School is NOT for everyone, and to be successful you don't ALWAYS have to have a degree BUT...be clear..you must be committed to learning and adding on to your greater mind. You can self teach yourself. I know so many people, men especially, who have not gone to school but can tell you facts on topics from history to physics because they DECIDED to pick up a book and read and to expand their mind on their own time.
The man who picks up garbage everyday makes a great salary but the man who understands what happens to the garbage after its picked up and why it happens, has a greater appreciation for what he does. In other words, knowledge is POWER and your passport to livelihood in the new world. Believe it!
Our President is a grand example of an educated man whose intelligence green lighted and secured his spot without a doubt. Had that man lacked the intelligence, diligence, articulation and wisdom that he had, no way would he be where he is.
Always push yourself to go further, to READ, to learn more, to discover new things, to research what you don't know or understand and to never ever give up and stop! I love you all for reading!
Have a marvelous day and stay focused on your paths!
Have a great weekend!
XOXOXOXO
Thursday, July 30, 2009
Tuesday, July 28, 2009
The Character Concealer....so many people wear it
You ever went to the dealership and saw the car of your dreams. The car looked like everything you've been looking for and you finally purchase it. After you have had it for a couple of months, it turns out to be a piece of junk. This all happens, EVEN THOUGH, it was brand new and looked amazing! Well guess what....Cars are not the only things that can trick us. People do as well. More often so, than we would like.
It really bugs me out when I learn of new people and admire them from a distance at first. Everything that they appear to be about looks great and in alignment with who I am. Then time passes, situations occur, and you get to know the real them and realize they are actually crazy. Literally. Some of these people who seem to have it soooooo together are just a hot flaming mess! There is just no other way to put it.
They might have the career, they might have the money, they may have the fame, but when you get to the know the root of who they are, their character, integrity and everything that they stand for, you realize they are more toxic then taking a bottle of bleach to the head.
This can turn into a sad situation because someone will always continue to get caught up in their trap and get swallowed up by their illusion. These people can turn out to be jealous, selfish, irresponsible, immature, liers, manipulators, thieves, gossipers, back stabbers and the list can go on. But on the exterior boyyyy, they appear to be the best thing since cool air on a muggy summer day.
I have dealt with this many times in my life, and the remedy is simple. Once a person shows you their hand more than once, its your turn to play your cards to give YOU the best possible outcome. Make your moves strategically and precise and in my experience that means taking certain people "in doses" My favorite thing to do.
Sometimes you don't have to cut someone off completely because it could be bad for social success...and that is another blog. But think and know your limits with everyone. You will thank yourself later.
Always remember Character is best seen when they think no one is watching or PAYING ATTENTION!
Have a great Tuesday!
Live limitless!
XOXOXO
It really bugs me out when I learn of new people and admire them from a distance at first. Everything that they appear to be about looks great and in alignment with who I am. Then time passes, situations occur, and you get to know the real them and realize they are actually crazy. Literally. Some of these people who seem to have it soooooo together are just a hot flaming mess! There is just no other way to put it.
They might have the career, they might have the money, they may have the fame, but when you get to the know the root of who they are, their character, integrity and everything that they stand for, you realize they are more toxic then taking a bottle of bleach to the head.
This can turn into a sad situation because someone will always continue to get caught up in their trap and get swallowed up by their illusion. These people can turn out to be jealous, selfish, irresponsible, immature, liers, manipulators, thieves, gossipers, back stabbers and the list can go on. But on the exterior boyyyy, they appear to be the best thing since cool air on a muggy summer day.
I have dealt with this many times in my life, and the remedy is simple. Once a person shows you their hand more than once, its your turn to play your cards to give YOU the best possible outcome. Make your moves strategically and precise and in my experience that means taking certain people "in doses" My favorite thing to do.
Sometimes you don't have to cut someone off completely because it could be bad for social success...and that is another blog. But think and know your limits with everyone. You will thank yourself later.
Always remember Character is best seen when they think no one is watching or PAYING ATTENTION!
Have a great Tuesday!
Live limitless!
XOXOXO
Thursday, July 23, 2009
Miss Misery just loves her some company!
You ever watched someone sit and destroy another person's character with their tongue. Just strip them of all dignity, admiration and respect because that person "felt" like giving their two cents and they wanted to gossip for gossip's sakes. I have watched so many people sit and do this over and over again, and the worst part of it all is, when that person is in their company again...they will smile, speak to them as if they never said such venomous things to begin with.
I have noticed that I cannot even stay in the same company as people who do this anymore, because they are giving you a glimpse of what they will eventually do to you. Your friendship is contingent on how "good" you are to them. As long as you stay in the parameters of doing what "pleases" them, then you are safe from the destruction as well. Riggghht. But who wants to live like this? Who wants to have weak people surrounding them all the time. The loudest one in the room is the weakest, why have them in your circle anyway, you only are as strong as that weak one.
I have no desire to surround myself with people who are negative, phony, haters, silent haters, spectators, everything that comes out of their mouth is a complaint or they are complaining about someone else. They usually don't even know how ridiculous they are, and you can't tell them anything because they KNOW IT ALL! Such a joke.
Do yourself a favor and listen to your spirit and leave those people right where they stand. They will always have someone who despises their energy around them, and you don't need it rubbing off on you.
Have a great weekend! Smile often and stay positive! :)
I have noticed that I cannot even stay in the same company as people who do this anymore, because they are giving you a glimpse of what they will eventually do to you. Your friendship is contingent on how "good" you are to them. As long as you stay in the parameters of doing what "pleases" them, then you are safe from the destruction as well. Riggghht. But who wants to live like this? Who wants to have weak people surrounding them all the time. The loudest one in the room is the weakest, why have them in your circle anyway, you only are as strong as that weak one.
I have no desire to surround myself with people who are negative, phony, haters, silent haters, spectators, everything that comes out of their mouth is a complaint or they are complaining about someone else. They usually don't even know how ridiculous they are, and you can't tell them anything because they KNOW IT ALL! Such a joke.
Do yourself a favor and listen to your spirit and leave those people right where they stand. They will always have someone who despises their energy around them, and you don't need it rubbing off on you.
Have a great weekend! Smile often and stay positive! :)
Tuesday, July 21, 2009
Are you a spectator or a supporter?
I remember growing up and my family having "get togethers" from time to time. It could be a BBQ, Birthday Party, Holiday Dinner, or a "Lets Entertain just because" type of thing. Of course I would always expect to see my family and very close friends, but there were times when there were folks who would actually come to functions, like birthday parties and baby showers etc., and they would come empty handed and have nothing to ADD on to the festivities.
These people are not just party crashers and don't add on to anything at events, they are people crashers and don't add on to ANYTHING usually at all. They can see you going through something, and they don't even try to give some of themselves to help the situation. They don't try to bring any positive energy and outlook to your life, they rather just sit and watch the way the chips fall. No sort of support or good intentions are ever seen.
Another word that describes these people perfectly are "NOSY". That is all they are really. They just wanna know what it is going on in your life NO MATTER what it is, because there isn't ENOUGH going on in theirs, and once they know what is going on, they will go and discuss with someone one else behind your back.
The sad part is we know who these spectators are in our life. They rarely reach out to us to ask how we are, never offers a helping hand, always empty handed, but always want to have a glimpse into your world. If that glimpse is just watching your social network page, wanting an invitation to something we are having, yet never participate in it, wants to comment and gossip about our moves all the time, only bringing negative energy to your world, why do you let them in? Start padlocking your personal life and space. They want everything easy, and you are a link to them getting what they want. Easy Free entertainment. Spectators need that.
Support those around you genuinely. Everyone can tell when you are half stepping, and just being plain nosy...and it's just corny in 2009!
Be safe! Love, Life Life.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY NANA! RIP!
XOXOXOXO
These people are not just party crashers and don't add on to anything at events, they are people crashers and don't add on to ANYTHING usually at all. They can see you going through something, and they don't even try to give some of themselves to help the situation. They don't try to bring any positive energy and outlook to your life, they rather just sit and watch the way the chips fall. No sort of support or good intentions are ever seen.
Another word that describes these people perfectly are "NOSY". That is all they are really. They just wanna know what it is going on in your life NO MATTER what it is, because there isn't ENOUGH going on in theirs, and once they know what is going on, they will go and discuss with someone one else behind your back.
The sad part is we know who these spectators are in our life. They rarely reach out to us to ask how we are, never offers a helping hand, always empty handed, but always want to have a glimpse into your world. If that glimpse is just watching your social network page, wanting an invitation to something we are having, yet never participate in it, wants to comment and gossip about our moves all the time, only bringing negative energy to your world, why do you let them in? Start padlocking your personal life and space. They want everything easy, and you are a link to them getting what they want. Easy Free entertainment. Spectators need that.
Support those around you genuinely. Everyone can tell when you are half stepping, and just being plain nosy...and it's just corny in 2009!
Be safe! Love, Life Life.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY NANA! RIP!
XOXOXOXO
Thursday, July 16, 2009
How is your tomorrow looking?
I had a conversation with someone recently in which the person said to me "Life is really based on all the decisions that you end up making". As the person said this, I was finishing their sentence but then for some reason it really hit me. Whatever I decided to do yesterday and today, will play a part in my today and tomorrows.
It takes a great deal of discipline and commitment for you to get up every single day, analyze and make each move strategic because you have your future in mind. Many will say I do this all the time, but you really don't always. If you did, you would not be speaking to that guy, you would not go there, you would not have done this and the list could go on and on. We take such huge risks on a daily basis and recover from them so effortlessly that we don't even realize it. It is just human for us all to not always think so seriously and hard about what we are about to do and what can come out of our mouths at all times. We forget how crucial this is.
As I always say Life can be whatever you decide to make it. You wanting to frown or smile through it all is totally on you. It will not always be easy, not even for the person who was born with a silver spoon in their mouth. There will always be some sort of obstacle or disadvantage that will not be what you want. It really comes down to your reaction and how you deal with it that makes whatever it is a lesson learned or in a vain.
Our minds are so powerful. You can simply change your way of thinking and change your life. You can choose to think positive about every single occurrence that happens in your world and it can play such a positive effect that you adapt it as a habit.
John Wayne once said:
"Tomorrow is the most important thing in life. Comes into us at midnight very clean. It's perfect when it arrives and puts itself in our hands. It hopes we've learned something from yesterday."
It takes a great deal of discipline and commitment for you to get up every single day, analyze and make each move strategic because you have your future in mind. Many will say I do this all the time, but you really don't always. If you did, you would not be speaking to that guy, you would not go there, you would not have done this and the list could go on and on. We take such huge risks on a daily basis and recover from them so effortlessly that we don't even realize it. It is just human for us all to not always think so seriously and hard about what we are about to do and what can come out of our mouths at all times. We forget how crucial this is.
As I always say Life can be whatever you decide to make it. You wanting to frown or smile through it all is totally on you. It will not always be easy, not even for the person who was born with a silver spoon in their mouth. There will always be some sort of obstacle or disadvantage that will not be what you want. It really comes down to your reaction and how you deal with it that makes whatever it is a lesson learned or in a vain.
Our minds are so powerful. You can simply change your way of thinking and change your life. You can choose to think positive about every single occurrence that happens in your world and it can play such a positive effect that you adapt it as a habit.
John Wayne once said:
"Tomorrow is the most important thing in life. Comes into us at midnight very clean. It's perfect when it arrives and puts itself in our hands. It hopes we've learned something from yesterday."
Tuesday, July 7, 2009
What I know for sure....TODAY.
I remember a couple of years ago I picked up this small book by Oprah called "The Top 20 Things that I know for sure". Oprah posed the question to everyone "What do you know for sure"? When you really put thought to this question, it isn't as easy as it seems.
Disqualifying information like your name and address obviously, ask yourself "What do you know for sure".
This got me to thinking about my own 20 things that I know for sure. These change as time and experiences go on, but this is where I am today.
1- No matter how bad today is, tomorrow leaves room for joy and improvement.
2- A smile can be contagious.
3- Paying ANYONE (stranger or friend) and unexpected compliment can do wonders for someone's spirit in a matter of seconds.
4- Money WILL make your life easier, but it is the space that you are in within your life that will prove if the feeling is rewarding.
5- My life is bigger than me. There is a higher power ruling the main stage. I am the starring role.
6- Faith can literally move mountains. It is how much you believe in something that will determine its power in your life.
7- Looking at children in their element is like watching GOD work first hand.
8- It is important that there is absolutely something that you believe in and are willing to die for. This is PASSION.
9- No matter how many times you have been hurt in LOVE, it is SOOO worth it to fall back into it. Never run from Love. Embrace it.
10- A good home cooked meal can sometimes make you feel like you are on top of the world.
11- When you work hard and put everything you have into something, the universe has no choice but to repay you, and the reward is GREAT. Hard work ALWAYS pays off.
12- Loyalty & Trust are hard to come by, no matter who someone is or how close they claim you are to them.
13- If someone shares something with you in confidence...HONOR IT! This can be one of the most amazing things you can do for someone and watch how your relationship will grow.
14- There are some people who will cut you down and think nothing of it. Their role is to be an opportunist and look out only for them. Do not be in denial about this sort of person. They do exist, just be smart.
15- Nothing is never bad enough to give up. Everything happens in time. Love, Career, Family and Passion is discovered when the time is right.
16- Spirituality is the backbone to our existence. Get in tune with yours.
17- We are at our most true when we are doing and acting as if no one is watching.
18- Complaining and SAYING what you want to change will do nothing for the result that you ultimately want. You must DO, and make what you want happen.
19- Nothing feels better in the world than new love.
20- Help someone do something daily. If it is giving directions, a helping hand, advice, affection, or a hug. Make sure that on a daily basis you GIVE in some way to the next person. This is our purpose.
Disqualifying information like your name and address obviously, ask yourself "What do you know for sure".
This got me to thinking about my own 20 things that I know for sure. These change as time and experiences go on, but this is where I am today.
1- No matter how bad today is, tomorrow leaves room for joy and improvement.
2- A smile can be contagious.
3- Paying ANYONE (stranger or friend) and unexpected compliment can do wonders for someone's spirit in a matter of seconds.
4- Money WILL make your life easier, but it is the space that you are in within your life that will prove if the feeling is rewarding.
5- My life is bigger than me. There is a higher power ruling the main stage. I am the starring role.
6- Faith can literally move mountains. It is how much you believe in something that will determine its power in your life.
7- Looking at children in their element is like watching GOD work first hand.
8- It is important that there is absolutely something that you believe in and are willing to die for. This is PASSION.
9- No matter how many times you have been hurt in LOVE, it is SOOO worth it to fall back into it. Never run from Love. Embrace it.
10- A good home cooked meal can sometimes make you feel like you are on top of the world.
11- When you work hard and put everything you have into something, the universe has no choice but to repay you, and the reward is GREAT. Hard work ALWAYS pays off.
12- Loyalty & Trust are hard to come by, no matter who someone is or how close they claim you are to them.
13- If someone shares something with you in confidence...HONOR IT! This can be one of the most amazing things you can do for someone and watch how your relationship will grow.
14- There are some people who will cut you down and think nothing of it. Their role is to be an opportunist and look out only for them. Do not be in denial about this sort of person. They do exist, just be smart.
15- Nothing is never bad enough to give up. Everything happens in time. Love, Career, Family and Passion is discovered when the time is right.
16- Spirituality is the backbone to our existence. Get in tune with yours.
17- We are at our most true when we are doing and acting as if no one is watching.
18- Complaining and SAYING what you want to change will do nothing for the result that you ultimately want. You must DO, and make what you want happen.
19- Nothing feels better in the world than new love.
20- Help someone do something daily. If it is giving directions, a helping hand, advice, affection, or a hug. Make sure that on a daily basis you GIVE in some way to the next person. This is our purpose.
Thursday, July 2, 2009
MEMORIES....don't live like people do....
Sometimes I sit and think about the times I had with her and it makes me smile. She took the best care of me EVER, I miss that. I miss knowing no matter what she would always be there to make sure I was OK...ALWAYS. I sometimes sit and can loose my myself in the memories and when I come out of the long thought, I look to pick up the phone or go visit, but she isn't here anymore.
Such is Life...Death. We live and we move on. I have to remember that, just because she no longer is here..I can still speak out. She hears me. She knows I wish I could just hug her one more time. That is what is unfair in it all. She can take me all in, It is I who is limited from here.
I have my days...where I miss her a whole lot and today is one of those days.
We all have our moments. I think about what she would say, I hear her response to what I just said, I wonder how she would feel if she saw THIS! I know she can see how happy I am. I know she would love every bit of it. She would smile, donning her gold rim on her perfectly straight teeth, and we would split an apple. :)
Death happens. Life continues...We miss, We remember...I love you! R.I.P. NANA!
Light a candle for all your missed loved ones. They appreciate it!
LOVE YOU ALL!
Have a great weekend and EAT MUCH!
XOXOXOXO
Such is Life...Death. We live and we move on. I have to remember that, just because she no longer is here..I can still speak out. She hears me. She knows I wish I could just hug her one more time. That is what is unfair in it all. She can take me all in, It is I who is limited from here.
I have my days...where I miss her a whole lot and today is one of those days.
We all have our moments. I think about what she would say, I hear her response to what I just said, I wonder how she would feel if she saw THIS! I know she can see how happy I am. I know she would love every bit of it. She would smile, donning her gold rim on her perfectly straight teeth, and we would split an apple. :)
Death happens. Life continues...We miss, We remember...I love you! R.I.P. NANA!
Light a candle for all your missed loved ones. They appreciate it!
LOVE YOU ALL!
Have a great weekend and EAT MUCH!
XOXOXOXO
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