Thursday, January 29, 2009

"To the left, to the left..if you wanna leave, be my guest you can step"....

My title comes from Lil Wayne song "Too Comfortable" and he said it best! "Yeah, to the left , to the left, if you wanna leave, be my guest you can step, feeling Irreplaceable listening to Beyonce, But okay, I put you out on your bday".

I have never ever ever understood why women and men who get into new relationships, in the beginning everything is PERFECT and you are in bliss. It feels like lying down on cool sheets for the first time on a warm night and then after 2-4 feels like a hot pillow you have to keep flipping over so you can feel that coolness again.

I recently had a debate with some very intellectual, and talented folks..shout out to JANINE! We debated and discussed the issue of women (in particular) being cheated on..or pushed to the side by heir men because they have either gained extremes amount of weight, just don't keep themselves up like they used to, or they treat the act of giving up some good loving like tax happens once a year!

Now I am WOMAN...a very PROUD one at that, and I must say that I have caught some slack for this but....YOU are responsible and can hold yourself accountable if your man starts dipping in the cookie jar that belongs to someone else, because you have started to do the above descriptions! I mean who else is there to really blame?

As women there is alot on our plate , especially us mothers! We hold it down always and most of the time we get no "pat" on the back for it. Then again we don't look for one nor does it keep us being the phenomenal women we are! This brings me right into the point of we should be up keeping ourselves and looking splashy all the time because we WANT to not because we are doing it for a man!

If you lured that man into your life, and while you were doing it, you had your nails done, hair fresh, feet soft, figure tight, complexion flawless, then why because you have him for 2-5 years now it stops? THEN..when he has some new estrogen circulating in his environment you want to rift and have a fit! HELLO WE LIVE IN NYC! Your man is destined to see an average of at least 8 BAD Broads for every 2 blocks he walks. The percentages get higher based on what part of NYC you live. That is another blog. :)

I think...unconsciously you know all you do is....complain, nag, investigate, pry and put that man under a microscope as if he is your child, when he is not....he is a GROWN MAN! Then you mad because he can't even be honest about what he is doing..he has to come up with lies and map his moves out strategically, because he knows you will turn into "MOM" and put the beats on him.

In addition lets just say you really got you a "CATCH" ..Fine, intelligent, long money, gentleman, charismatic, swagger on a a hundred thousand trillion, and you falling short in more than a couple areas. How does this equation work?

Just like in math....things just don't add up. When we as women go out to pamper ourselves on our weekly regime (I do weekly) but every two weeks is fair as well, We should ALWAYS do it for us and with the intent that we want our outsides to match our insides.

I understand that not everyone is feeling "FABTACULAR" on the inside every single day and you go through your times where you just don't have it in you. That is fine and normal. BUT...If you have decided to have a man that you have committed yourself to and in return you want this man to do the same, you have to think outside of yourself.

You cannot check his phone and be a lice in his hair if you are not fulfilling the requirements that you set forth in the beginning. I know some women as I mentioned yesterday in my conversation...who don't bathe for 2 days on the weekends...stay miserable, drink beers, and gain weight in the process.

I am not speaking to women who have dropped their man's baby and have put on a few pounds because of it...that's normal and it will take time to get off, but be committed to doing so. Even if you were born with a "plump" gene...I am telling you..I have seen some FIERCE women who are large and doing their thing, and will put any skinny chick to shame!

I don't care what ANY MAN TELLS YOU! Let me tell you....a man loves a woman that smells good, a woman that wears clothes that flatters HER figure (may she be skinny or plump), a CONFIDENT women, a woman who he can laugh with and can make him laugh, a woman who is affectionate, a woman who can compliment him and make him feel like he is the only thing that matters, a woman that can communicate honestly what she is feeling, a woman that is secure with who she is and what position she plays, a woman that recognizes when he takes time to do something for her and broadcasts it to the world, a woman who is not afraid of the tough times and is a ride-or die, a woman he can confide in without her telling anybody, a woman who is always ready when that shoulder tap comes in the wee hours (if you get my drift), a woman that can cook a meal, and can handle simple domestic duties, and lastly who can can love him in every way that he likes unconditionally!

You can argue that and you don't have to agree that you will do it, but believe me...I speak from experience. I have not always had these things down pact and I may not have mastered each one to a tee, but I am capable and have come to learn in my years that all of the above produces AMAZING results and I can almost give you a 100% guarantee that you will see a difference in your man if you do it.

NOW....wait....not all men deserve this ALL THE TIME! While some that you are dating don't deserve none at all, in which case you should probably loose that deadbeat. So be wise and smart on who you CHOOSE to cater these benefits to. That is another blog....A LONG ONE!

Love you all!



Tuesday, January 27, 2009

The generation of the "BANGWAGONER", The "WHACK G", "The WHORE", "The FAKE Chick", "The Pimp", "The Rapper".....List goes on

Where to start? When discussing originality and standing out in a time when everyone does the same EXACT things is just like being told to run in a Wal-mart and get what you want for FREE but you only have 5 minutes....I wouldn't know where to begin..there's SOO MUCH!!!!

People have no loyalty in this new day and age. If it is relating that down to a football team who is NOT in the Superbowl and now you just hopping on the bandwagon of the team playing to if you love an artist who may not be at the height of their career right forget about them and could care less about their motivations. Even in everyday life, with our friends..if that person is not on the scene, not at the hottest parties and not looking on point one time, you not checking for them. Are we really only as a good as our last performance?

I only ask this because there was a time when loyalty and commitment was taught in the household as something to adhere to as a way of life. It was a principle you had to honor and if you didn' would you live? Family and friends really looked out for one another and it was their right and purpose to help their sister or brother get a little closer to achieving their goals, if you had already surpassed that step.

It would be no surprise if you went to a Caribbean immigrant person's house in the late 70's early 80's and even now sometimes, and you could find a slew of relatives newly from their island staying with the person who has set up shop already and made a way for themselves. This was their contribution and their proactive approach to help someone else. They genuinely knew that it was and is bigger than just them.

The generation of today differs greatly because all they think about is SELF and the crazy thing is...they are consumed with Self but follow behind everything and everybody else's footsteps.

Somebody makes rocking a whole bunch of colors a trend everybody does it, somebody says this brand is the hot ish everybody wants it, somebody wears a scarf that is traditionally worn by Arabian men everybody wears it and its HOTT! Don't get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with adhering to fashion and having fun sometimes, but when do you learn to balance it out with who you really are! When do you stop walking as a zombie, when did you last check in with your self mentally and it was completely silent. You actually set up time to do this with you, the same way you make plans to do everything else.

I know this girl who literally everything she wears or buys she pays almost close to nothing for it because she shops at thrift store's and vintage shops for less. She is BEAUTIFUL, AMAZING and highly sought after by all men! Does she feel she needs to rock all these high price designers, who ain't adding on to her quality of life, or purpose on this planet, NO! She is doing what her spirit naturally calls on her to do.

There is nothing wrong with buying quality pieces and if you can afford to live in that space by all means go for it. I am not saying that I live by what I describe above, but the luxuries I do have I can afford them at this moment. If I cannot then I do not purchase! SIMPLE.

I have seen people take their entire pay check to buy a dress that, even if you have the money to buy it, what happens after you wear it? You cant buy lunch for the week, and now I have to pay for your lunch, pay for your coat check when we go out, and pay for parking because... "I ain't got it"....YOU should have stayed home! Better yet you should have never tried to live in a world that is not familiar to you!

Time comes and things happen at the rate that they should. Some folks wonder why they don't live as easy, financially free as others, and the question is simple...God and the universe know that if you had access to some of the things not present in your life you would blow it and miss the lesson. You would not contribute nor focus on the greater purpose of your existence.

There are some who the universe does put in these comfy positions and they still act a fool and blow it, but their purpose and lesson is different from yours. I feel we need to acknowledge this difference we all have and live it.

Stop being like everybody else, don't just rock that coat because Vogue says it is "IT", don't just hang in that circle because all the "cool" people are there, don't just talk to that guy because he has money,and everyone thinks you are crazy if you don't, Don't just write a blog because everyone else is doing it but you really have nothing to what you LOVE NATURALLY!

Just as love is natural, so is existing! Stop forcing things to be in your life that do not have a place in there yet...things will come in time and you will reach your highest peak when you have focused and became one with the essence of who you really are! Don't tell me you already did it....because it is an ongoing process and the job is not even half done!

Be YOU and make your own trends...not everybody will like it, but it will fit in with the band that you are leading to march!

Love you all!!!!!


Thursday, January 22, 2009


I really wanted to leave my OBAMA talk at the door since he has been inaugurated and sworn in and the BARACK season is starting to settle....but for my last in depth look at the man who makes me really get excited...I want to acknowledge the lovely lovely gentleman he allowed the world to meet on Tuesday!

Yes, everyone says this mans style, confidence and overall swagger is off the charts...but to watch that man with his woman made my heart melt! Its the way he looks and glances over at her and the way she looks at him .... YOU feel the love popping right off the screen! When was the last time America watched a real life romance unfold right before our eyes.

Now don't get me wrong..I love Michelle for the strong, dedicated woman she is to those beautiful girls, and the intelligence and sacrificed she has made for her family. Let us not forget this woman can be making six figures some place with her Harvard law degree, yet she quit and sacrifice her own career to create another one standing beside her husband. I respect this about her, BUT, I do feel she sometimes needs to LOOSEN UP! She can be really STIFF!

Here I am watching this fine specimen twirl his wife around during their dance, after he just finished saying "How good she looks", and when he twirls her, she shy's up and does not even put the moves on him and embrace that spin! Once again Michelle made me feel like she is not going over the top and head over heels over this man!

I first began to notice the attitude from her on the Barbara Walters special around Thanksgiving when Barbara asked her was she cooking for Thanksgiving, and she responded "NO, My man has just won the Presidency I think I deserve a pass"....EXCUSE ME! Maybe it is me, but if my man won the Presidency I am cooking every dish that he loves JUST BECAUSE, and then some! Many who know me well know I was not impressed by this nonsense, but I had to lighten up because if Barack isn't complaining why should I.

Then I watched her hold the bible as he gave his oath and I saw the genuine LOVE and ADMIRATION this woman had on her face while she looked at her husband and I came to tears. I know what they have is something special! I know he is something special, I just wish she SHOWED us more sometimes.

I guess a part of me wanted to see her shake it and serenade him in that lovely dress and put the first lady moves all over that! I must be honest. I was not impressed with her stiffness, and distraction with her concern for the way she looked to everyone else. That is all you Ms. OBAMA...act like you know!

Then again I had to realize that she is a woman of a certain age and I guess the rage, and sensations that run through my 26 year old body have slowed down for her. She knows what she has, and she knows that he loves her deeply and what the two of them share is not for me or anyone else.

We are privileged to see the doses of love stares, kisses on the cheeks and lips, and small back rubs that the two like to give us every so often! I am being selfish and a bit crazy at times, but my affection runs deep. :)

I wish OUR President a wonderful, joyous, achievable, successful and memorable TWO terms! (He will serve two) In addition, I hope that we all as a collective work to help him do what it is this world needs. It is not just about what Obama can do for us but what we will do WITH him. I end with a excerpt from his inaugural address that I thought captures the point I am trying to make.

"For as much as government can do and must do, it is ultimately the faith and determination of the American people upon which this nation relies. It is the kindness to take in a stranger when the levees break, the selflessness of workers who would rather cut their hours than see a friend lose their job which sees us through our darkest hours. It is the firefighter's courage to storm a stairway filled with smoke, but also a parent's willingness to nurture a child, that finally decides our fate."

Love you all! Have a great weekend!


Tuesday, January 20, 2009


So I had no IDEA what to type today because I am sooo engulfed in all the festivities and play by play action of this momentous occasion. As the weekend happened, I did not have the fire and excitement that so many around me had. Of course I was happy beyond words this was becoming a reality, but all the celebrity coverage and over saturation was really becoming too much.

Nonetheless, January 20,2009...this day... I woke up with cherry bells on! I am more than excited that today marks the most memorable inauguration of my lifetime, my parents lifetime, and my grandmother's lifetime. This is IT! I am happy, filled with joy and sooo proud of the man who will now lead the land I walk on.

I was watching Oprah yesterday and Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moore, along with a slew of other celebs were on the show since the O lady was filming Live from the capital. Ashton Kutcher made a statement about Obama that catches the essence of who this man really is to me. He said when he met Obama 2 years ago, and this was well after the DNC, he told Obama how inspired and moved he was by his speech at the DNC, and that he thought he should really run for the Presidency. Obama said to Ashton " Yes, I have been getting that from people these days, but I have to see how Michelle and my family feel about this because it will have a great impact on them, I am not sure I want to do that to them". Ashton said and I can agree "Who wouldn't want this man to be our leader. To think of anything outside of himself before considering to be President, that is the kind of President I want".

I look at Obama and he has his confidence on high, the gentleman side of him is always present, his love for his daughters is impeccable. You have to watch this man MOVE..I study it. On Saturday after he gave his speech to the thousands of people standing at the Lincoln Memorial, He made his remarks to the crowd that was about 8 minutes, and when he was done he came back to his presidential cube with his family and the first thing he said was to Malia. "Was that OK? and she shrugged " It was good". I almost melted.

It is one thing to be a father, and to just be around your children, but to really be PRESENT to who they are, their development, what they love what they don't, their opinions, is another. When he is with Michelle, he is always holding the small of her back, glancing over at her to see if her face shows approval and she is good. I just love his selflessness that he possesses. It's simply MARVELOUS!

I wish him the best term and the best evening he can have! He is a force to be reckoned with. I love my President for the 1st time in my life, I love him!!!! It's amazing! God Bless this land and God bless that man. He has ignited a new wave of living, and it feels good!

All my peoples in D.C. stay safe and take in this moment to the fullest!

Love you all!


Thursday, January 15, 2009


If you are a size 2- 6 with a coca-cola bottle shape, impeccable style and as they say 'cute in the face and slim in the waist' then you may not realize how good you may have it. I did not realize how "fortunate" I was either ladies...let me explain.

So I have a hand full of friends who may be a little on the plumper side of things but they are BEAUTIFUL! I mean just gorgeous women. They have it going on but they may be a little bit more endowed than some. What I notice is that these bigger women are REALLL pretty. Pay attention to that. When you find a pretty big girl she is reallly hott, and they know how to satisfy their men, with no concern with how they appear either, which is why you will find more and more men wanting to lock them down a big girl these days, but that's another blog.

Anyway...I have been out on the town with some of my plumper girls and if we go to a club or lounge that we may be new to us, the bouncer will give some attitude or resistant. I have even had the guy at the door pull me to the side and say "Why you bring big girl, ya'll could have been right without her", in which point, this is my cue to start flipping on dude, without telling my friend what just happened to spare her feelings and not ruin her night! Even though she knows she is fierce why would I tell her something like that.

So...this brings me to my point...with all the societal brainwashing we have already, why is it that even in our own interaction with each other day to day these stereotypes have to exist. It is not enough that we see small petite fair skinned woman on the covers of every magazine, and in all the movies, TV shows and commercials. It is not enough that the majority of all of our talented singers just so happen to be the perfect size too.

NYC, MIAMI and LA are some of the best party cities in the country if not the ONLY true party cities in the country. I have found in both NYC and MIAMI that this standard of "beauty" has to be upheld if you are to have a social night life. I cannot speak firsthand on LA since I am going to LA this summer for the first time, but everyone who goes tells me its 15x worst there, and it is even more intense because just to walk down the street you have to be looking red carpet ready. To shop, to run to the drug store, for lunch! UGH! The pressure.

It basically does not even come down to size sometimes...if you just are not "pretty" enough (especially in Miami) you are not allowed to go to the best parties and have fun like everyone else, unless you of course are a well known star or with one. In which case, let me tell you that is even rare. You will hardly ever find big girls running in the entourage of any of your fav celebrities.

I have had conversations with guys who run parties and have pull to get in any party that's jumping and the first thing he will ask me is "Everybody is right"? "In which case what do I say? Its hard. I mean of course I think they are but then again how will I know the pig headed doorman at the front will or will my friend approve of the girls I have with me?

How about getting in the club and then when we are there I am told that only me and two of my selected friends can get into VIP because the other two just ain't cutting it. EXCUSE ME!

This is why I now realize I am outgrowing the party scene and can only do it for special occasions and events that I must attend. I cannot take part in making people feel like crap and inadequate because of some idiots who think they are not "good" enough. Good enough to what drink and act a damn fool for a couple of hours. We can go and get some good grub for all that!

I have planned vacations with people and they say "Lets' not bring such and such...we wont get in anywhere with her" THIS IS CRAZY! But it is true! This is why girlfriends and women are insecure and self doubting themselves. This is why they feel they have to come out NAKED, especially in Miami and NYC, this is why they sum their self worth up to their appearance when in actuality this is the least part of importance to who you are as a person.

I feel that even though these stereotypes exist and it wont change over night..we have to stop playing into them and be the change we want to see. I know none of you will admit to playing into it but every time you DON'T call a certain friend because you don't think she is "BAD" enough you are, every time you wear something that you know DOES NOT FIT, or has your "privates" "PUBLIC" you are, every time you don't tell that bouncer or doorman what he can do and where he can shove it after he insults your friend behind her back you play into it.

Think about that woman who USED to be a size 4/5 and is now a 14/16 after having some kids, her body has not snapped back into place and she still hangs out with you, who she has for years who looks amazing still. It is not easy for her either! Hanging out with a bunch of "skinny b****" as Monique likes to call us. Always think about the pressure she goes through.

We have to KNOW that we are beautiful no matter what size we are, what you have that the next person may have more or less of, how long your hair is, what complexion you are, how big your asset's are..they are yours and I promise not another person on the planet has what YOU have and can USE it the way you do!

If the doorman rejects you then he has rejected the chance to experience heaven on earth for a second because you are a physical BLESSING!

All my big girls! I love you and them haters ain't got nothing on you!

Keep shaking it and dropping it like its hot and dance till your feet hurt!

Have a great weekend! Go see that NOTORIOUS movie! :)


Tuesday, January 13, 2009

I'm IN MY SKINNNY JEANS...and feeeling GOOOD!

Is it possible we can Outgrow our homies like we do that polo knit we LOVEDDDD back in the day but it just does not fit the same. HELL YES! The problem is when you outgrow folk it ain't so easy to admit nor is it easy to just ship it off like we do the knit.

See with the knit we can easily put it on and see that joint is hugging us a little too tight and since we won't embarrass ourselves we will take it off, come to terms with the fact it just does not fit us the same and either hand it down to our lil cousin or donate it to the salvation army. Friends can be different. Especially if you and that person were two peas in a pod. It is even worst!

Unfortunately this can be a hard pill to swallow since people are ALWAYS concerned with what other people think. I don't care if you are one of those people who believe "I don't care what nobody thinks about me and mine and what I am doing"...YOU ARE A LIE! Every human being, unless they are a tad bit mentally slow...cares what someone thinks about them, and why shouldn't you!? Your reputation and character are at stake..and I don't know about you but I work hard to build the reputation and character I have, so if someone tries to taint that without warrant...yes I will be pissed. Who wouldn't?

Of course I won't lose my character or integrity over it, but I will be disappointed that someone would speak against me and something that I clearly am not doing. Which brings me back to the original point.

You and Trichelle just are not the same people anymore, the original essence that glued you two together has now loosed because of new life experiences, new callings that may not be aligned with each other. New intentions, new energies and it takes a certain fabric of adult to admit this and to move on from it.

This does not mean you don't like Bailey's Irish Cream from Haagen Dazs anymore just as much as she does and you still cant take a trip with her every now and again to get some if time permits. It just means that she will not be rolling with you as much the way she used to because her energy and intentions have shifted. She does not seem to like to see you happy and moving forward with the life that you always wanted for yourself because she is still stuck in point A where you met her, and then again who's fault is that?

She is not happy that your romeo has come and makes it clear he will give up SEVEN POUNDS for you...(check that new Will Smith if you already have not), she is not excited that you are bold, daring and willing to take on the world for whatever your passion is. She is just not excited about nothing. She rather self loathe, complain, be negative and gossip about the things that everybody else has going on, instead of putting the microscope on herself.

She will attend events with you and come to your functions just to knit pick and point out the mistakes and things that "could have been better" and " why didn't you come and say anything to me the whole night.". She is a brat, a baby, a walking POISON! She must be taken off and put on ICE!

Yes you grew up with her, she was your road dog, ace boon coon, home skillet, I can talk about my bathroom visits type of homie but as all things sometimes end...this has too.

You have grown, You have moved on to another phase and as you welcomed her and encouraged her to come with you down the journey of life, she just cant seem to keep up because she has way to much luggage for the trip. You told her PACK LIGHT, you will get further...she rather bring everything and slow you down...she is a BAG LADY! You had to leave could not wait. You can not allow her weight to fall on you. Next thing you know she will be asking you to carry about 4 of her bags and you couldn't do that....RIGHT?

You are sooo close to your are almost there...and you turn around and you cant see her no more...she is still trooping it...and it is OK. She will reach this point when she is ready. All You know is you how far you have come, and you are happy. No love lost, you will always be her friend...but maybe from a distance because it just fits you better these days that way!



Trim off the excess fat in your relationships and in your life!!!!

Thursday, January 8, 2009

The Trifling Truffle! EVIL B**** are amongst us! for my fellas this has been LONG overdue! "Dee why you always coming at us men"? and the most OUTRAGEOUS one "Dee, are you a male brasher"? DUH! NO! anybody who knows me KNOWS I praise and LOVE a good man! So ....Today I will focus on the anatomy of the female B***! And yes you read right!

As I watched a movie the other night with someone extremely close to me (I am withholding name for privacy), they went on to tell me about a story that I thought had to be the most trifling tale of 2009 thus far! and it goes a little something like this....

(Names have been changed to protect the innocent...NYC is smaller than you think). TRUE STORY.

Trevor and Omar are cousins. Omar's girl Sheila is BAD! Trevor always admired Sheila but never ever thought of pushing up out of respect. Circa 1995 Omar starts getting more familiar in the rap game, going on tour with big artists, rolling in the entourage's of HUGE names, and forgets about Sheila. Well as life happens, Trevor is there for Sheila while Omar is living the life. Trevor goes to Omar circa 2001 as a man like, " Bro, I love her, I know you and her are done, but out of respect I am thinking about proposing to Sheila". Omar is like "Wow, hey do you. I'm good. Wish you the best".

Life is sweet, Trevor does right by Sheila. Marries her they have 2 kids. Trevor decides to enlist in the army soon after. He cant get a break as a black man, and he goes for it. Of course since this is close to "9-11" they ship him right to Iraq. He writes, she responds..everything appears fine on the surface. He gets news ...He is finally going home...JUST RECENTLY!

So now we are at the present date 2009! He comes home to find out that Sheila not only has been seeing OMAR...she is 5 months PREGNANT by OMAR the other cousin!

NOW! This ish right here makes me wanna HOLLA! Here you are a man's wife, and his children's mother...and you have the nerve while this man is getting grenades thrown at his neck on the daily..risking his life, everyday in a foreign land so he can provide for you who ain't never worked a day in your have the nerve to sleep with his cousin and get pregnant!

This is a typical, regular occurrence within our society...women can be some of the most trifling, conniving, selfish, gold digging, greedy, jealous, SHADY specimens I have ever seen. I have touched on this before with women and women but I will focus on the behavior of the B*** with the opposite sex today.

There are women who do the following, and I know this from experience, and my homeboys experience's. Here are some prime examples:

They date one man JUST to get closer to the next. They befriend the girlfriend of a man THEY want. They flirt with their homegirl's men behind their friends back. They have children by men and tell the men the kid's are hungry and use the money to get a doobie and some acyrlic on their bum nails! They call their baby father in the middle of the night claiming the baby is sick when in actuality when dude gets there she is standing there with a teddy on waiting to be smashed and she knows he just left his current girlfriend at home. They spend hours on the phone with you, gain your trust as a friend and start spreading rumors and lies to everyone and tells your business. They don't get up to go to work, even when they COULD, they rather sleep with Jason, Brock and Maurice to get their bills paid. They think because they ride, slip and slide with another woman's man that he belongs to her and he will leave his wife. They fight with other women in the street over men who aren't there's. They go through their man's phone, email and texts just to be nosy! This is horrible!

I can go on and on! The descriptions above are disgusting and unacceptable on all levels. The women I describe are among all of us, and you might be that woman. Do I care to curb my aggressions if you are ...NO! You must stop being a "Trifling Truffle".

That is the name of the these women. Why? Because most of these women appear to be pretty put together..hott...tempting.. and appealing as truffles are. Truffles are creamy delicate chocolate candies.....and who wouldn't want some of that? But underneath that buttermilk is some of the most deadliest venom of trife you wanna see...and men and women... BEWARE!

Women are very smart too...We know how to get what we want, and in a sly about way. She will ride you ...check your voicemail..after detecting the code and be out there doing EVERYTHING under the sun...and you wont have a clue! She will make you feel like you are her only knight in shining armor and turn around and share her goodness with your boys, because their paper is longer! She will be amongst you and your friends with your girl being there and she will talk nasty about how she can drop it likes its hot so she can secretly make you get excited IN FRONT of your girl. She will wear NOTHING but a bra and panties to the club because she wants someone to take her skank butt home. I could go on for days, and it makes me sad. It really does.

I love my Sisters! I love them so much! I love when women can truly love each other and form a bond and help each other to grow, but a sister like me, I cannot do this with just anybody. I am a woman with class, respect, and honor, and I work hard. YOU HEAR ME! Just as soooo many of us are, we cannot allow this beast into our circles.

We must start identifying the trifling truffle and calling it out and making sure to keep the trifling truffle away! I am not saying save the trifling truffle for she will be the only one to save herself! As the saying goes, "You can't turn a hoe into a housewife"..never have never will. She has to rehabilitate herself, she must see for herself that she can be a TROPHY TRUFFLE!

I am no longer trying to save these bitter specimens. I have befriended some trifling truffles in my day to try to help and encourage them and they always strike! I am done. I will love from a distance and encourage them in ways that won't drain my spirit.

As my friend said to me at the end of the conversation when he told me this unfortunate story he said, "Dee, you look surprised there are evil bitches in the better know"....So I tell you .....BEWARE of the EVILNESS of the TRIFLING TRUFFLE..She is on the prowl looking for her next victim. And she may be wearing GUCCI



Have a great wekeend!!!! I plan to! BE SAFE!


Tuesday, January 6, 2009

What's the 411?

What is it about Mary J. songs that just always get women through some tough love times! Like I won't front, many of my friends will ride to the deaths defending Mary when she sounds a hot mess and I will be the first to say, "She aight, but she still can't sing"...this becomes an all out war and debate and people looking at me like I am crazy, but what I did not realize is that this woman has carried women through breakup's, through domestic situations, through falling in love and out of love and the message is always constant..."I am gonna be alright, cause I am fly".

One thing about Mary is she can rock a song and sing it from the pit of her soul and meet you at that road where you know she knows what you are feeling. Even if she is a little off key, she brings that wrath. I saw her in concert once, and she damn near brought the stage down (literally) she most definitely can tear up a stage. Energy, excitement and passion, that is the key to performing.

Anyway...Deandra, Why do you bring up Mary? Well I have so many albums in my i-pod..some are on auto pilot, like my soundtracks to my Get hype get it on music..OWWW!, you get the drift..but yesterday on my way home I decided to listen to some albums I have in my i-pod that I never listen to in its entirety, and believe it or not, Mary's last album Growing Pains is one I never dissected and listened to in its entirety.

Of course "Just Fine" ,"Grown Woman" and "Work that out" we have all heard and were bangers, but one song that moved me almost out the train seat yesterday was "Feel like a Woman". I was bugging by myself, had people looking like "What she got in HER ears"? I think MEN should play this song every single day before they leave the house...and before they rest their heads! WOW!

Please listen to this song, All I needed to hear was "If your on your way home, stop and buy me something, Boy, buy me a bag or buy me some shoes, This is a part of me I am trying to get you use to"....WHATTT! Now of course many will say ( and mostly men) "Why he can't just love her, or make a card, get creative with it. Why he gotta buy her something?". Yes he can be creative but why should us ladies take the things we love to receive in our lives out of the equation because you are with a man who does not hold these things valuable! Or a man who is tighter with his wallet then some latex skinny's. NO!

Everyone can jump on the "she a gold digger"..."she don't want me she just want gifts"..and don't mistake me..there ARE women out here to rob you for every penny you have and she still won't be satisfied. But a woman that has been riding and down with you for a long time, and has proven her loyalty and commitment to you DESERVES to be surprised every now and again with some Fabulosity and men are getting off easy when they are ALLOWED to fall short in this department!

I want little surprises all the time! That is who I am! My Mother did it for me growing up so I won't SETTLE for anything less. I was fortunate enough to get surprises every now and then from my man in my time, and it is one of the best feelings a woman can feel, especially when on top of that you are treated like fragile glass, and handled very delicately.....GIRLLLLL stop! lol.

Fellas if you cannot afford GUCCI or the new Christian Louboutin heels, then that is fine. Pick her up her favorite fragrance, a book she might like, hell call fresh direct and put in a major order and have her refrigerator stocked nicely with food and snacks and throw some stuff you like in it so she can cook it! (I am foodie and LOVE this surprise....) But these are hints and ideas to getting that woman to be at your beck and call and doing EVERYTHING you want!

It is not all about the material but the energy and time you take to make her day feel like a little easier.

Read the lyrics then listen to the song if you can! Pure HOTNESS! MARY keep speaking for the ladies and repping...That is why you are the QUEEN! :)

Love you all!!!!


Thursday, January 1, 2009

Today is the first day of the rest of your life.....(everyday)

Another year has came and gone...Today marks the first day of 2009 and the rest of our lives. How will you live it? Will you be true to yourself at all times and be authentic with what you feel in your heart and in your soul. Will you be honest with the people in your life all the time and encourage them to be better than they already are? I don't just mean those who are closest to you I mean those in your life. If you just pass someone on the street, sit next to them on the train, meet them for the 1st time, be genuine and be of assistance.

I heard something that struck a cord in me and I live by it, and that is "Be a good...even when nobody is looking". This says it all! Try to erase for a moment all of the expectations that your world has for you, try to focus on what your inner voice is saying to you and what your life is guiding you to do. Pay attention and be GREAT! Do what moves you, don't be afraid for life is really short. I promise it is! You are fine and well today and tomorrow can be the beginning of some news you were not prepared for or for someone close to you.

I brought the New Year in with my immediate family of 3, some of my close friends and some new ones. It was a very fun and enjoyable time. We ate, laughed, drank, played games and laughed! I had one of the hardest laughs of 2008 right there at that moment at 11:43 PM. A couple of seconds before midnight, as me and my friends played a game of TABOO, one of the players made me laugh harder than I think I laughed this entire year! And that is crazy because there is always jokes going on around me. lol.

I had to just take in that moment and love it! As my daughter is running around playing with her little friends and in her own little world, she is happy. Her parents are close by as they sit and laugh until their stomach aches, and all is good with the world at that moment. You have to just breathe it in and swallow it! You don't wanna exhale, you don't want the moment to pass, you don't want it to leave, you just want it to pause. But it can' never will. Time stops for no one, so what you do is just enjoy, be happy, brakes negative energy and non productivity and LIVE!

I plan on doing just that in this new year.



Love you! Make this year COUNT!