Thursday, December 17, 2009

Your Journey is leading to....

Today is a new day filled with hope,and all you have is faith that things will work out the way you imagine them to. You woke up with something on your mind and a split between two thoughts of which way you should go or how you should handle the situation. Speak out loud...even if its by yourself...he will hear you. He actually likes to hear you speak to him, for when you speak to him you speak to your spirit as well. You are acknowledging your spirit and the other unforeseen forces that govern your life...our destiny.

When will you stop pretending that all is good and something will just drop out the sky? When did hard work and determination not ever give you huge returns on your investment? A new year is steadily approaching us and that year will soon be gone. Since time never stops for any of us, will you be prepared when your golden moment of opportunity looks you in the face? They say opportunity is when success and preparation meet...what have you done to prepare?

I speak from a space of preparation. I have been sacrificing my blood sweat and tears to achieve the life I want for myself. The life I told myself I would have two years ago and I am finally starting to see it come to fruition, and all because I simply said "I want to do that". The journey has been long, hard, bumpy, leaving me needing an alignment like nobody's business...but it was always attainable.

I have learned that God helps those who help themselves. You can sit there and wish and pray for anything in this world, but you must seek out and do as needed with the strength you have to get it done and it will be.

Congratulations to all the wonderful folk in my life who are putting their God given talents to good use and fulfilling their duty of being a source of hope and a pillar of strength and a role model for inspiration.

Be grateful...Live open hearted.

Have a productive Thursday.


Tuesday, December 15, 2009

"I like the way you think".

I am a fan of LOVE when I feel it, see it, hear it, or even dream it....It never fails to leave me inspired and feeling in touch with a force that is powerful and forever yearned for.

I heard our first lady say something extremely powerful in an interview with Oprah a couple days ago, that just moved my spirit to joy. Oprah was interviewing the 1st couple and asking them how they balance it all, and how envied they could be because they seem so perfectly in love. Michelle answered the question so gracefully and exquisitely. Here is an excerpt.

Oprah : Is this a marriage to be envied?

Michelle: I think we have a wonderful marriage. I love my husband, he is my best friend. But I always like to talk honestly about it, because I think about young couples coming up who think there are no struggles to get here. There are and that's part of it. The message is, work through the struggles, start out with somebody that you respect and you trust, so that when you hit the bumps that are inevitable, you always have that foundation. I tell Barack, as mad as he may make me, I look at him and say "I really LIKE you". I like you and I like the way you think and I like the person that you are, and its hard to stray too far and to be mad too long when the person you are with is someone you like.

So incredible and so well versed. This personally captures the essence of REAL, TRUE, GENUINE love for me. To actually LIKE the person before you LOVE them, will prove the strength and the dedication to you staying where you are. DO you LIKE him? Do you like her? Do you like her traits? Do you like who they are in relation to their world that you exist in? Do you like how they talk to people? How they handle situations? How they make people feel? How they THINK? How they live? What they like to do? What makes them tick?

The road and and path to love and having the ultimate level of understanding is not easy nor smooth. Even when Love is great and things seem too perfect, it takes your attention and commitment to maintaining it and keeping it that way. You have to always put that other person's feelings in mind and work together to making sure that the both of you are happy, and if that is not intense work then what it?

As humans, it is hard for us to be content all the time, we allow so many variables to come in and disturb our momentum and test our faith on what we believe to be "working". I 100% know and believe that love is TEAM WORK and it will Be the most important collaboration that you Will ever take part in, in your life.

When we have love, and stability we feel good. We feel alive and we are in touch with the higher consciousness that resides in us all. We allow the GOD in us to seep out and be a source of light and inspiration for all around us.

Allow GOD to work through you more. Accept love when it comes your way and always give it to others. Love in all capacities is what releases us to living the life that was intended. Give plenty of it...out.


Have a Tasty Tuesday.

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

The ORIGIN of you!

Living in a day where everybody likes the same things...trends define most of the people you know. Everyone wants to indulge themselves in POP culture and follow everyone else actions...When does the time ever present itself when you can just "BE YOU"?

When do you take a moment to think about what you like, what you want, who you want?

The idea of being "Original", or not following suit, has become somewhat foreign. People are actually afraid to speak up and say what they truly feel if it goes against the majority. Why?

It is a gift to be the individuals we are, at the end of the day not one of us are truly the same. We all possess a brain that develops thoughts and ideas in its own magnificent way, so why opt to not use it or keep it silent.

I get a absolute kick out of having a great conversation with someone who can stimulate me beyond what everybody else is is talking about. Someone who can put me on to something clever, new and exciting.

With the new year approaching I challenge everyone to go against the grain and push yourself to explore and be a part of the greater world. To seek out what is not easily presented to you day in and day out in the media.

Start to be aware and actually care about the hardships that affect so many of us in other parts of this world. Provide assistance to someone who may need it, even if its locally. Be a part of the solution and not add on to the stagnation.

Be Original in your existence...or it will go in vain.

Love you all!


Thursday, November 26, 2009

Giving Thanks

I give thanks for good and the spirit that embodies giving. Without this effort within the human condition it means nothing. Give plenty, be in the spirit of serving others. I give Thanks on this day and I am grateful.

GIVE THANKS FOR IT ALL IN SPITE OF IT ALL...and speak aloud that you are grateful each and every day. So many of us focus on the things we want, the places we want to go. Give thanks for all that you have NOW.

Give thanks!!!!

Love you all! Eat and be grateful.

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Give me 5 minutes and maybe we can change the world!

How do you know the person who says "HELLO" to you as you walk up Madison Avenue is not a resourceful person to your destiny? I have asked myself this question time and time again because, I, for one love to meet and talk to new people. Sometimes this can have adverse affects but for the most part I have met some fascinating, intriguing individuals.

The main lesson that I have learned over the years of just being open to conversation from strangers, is that you never know the similarities and the unseen force, that is constantly working to bring that particular person in your space at that exact time/moment. I believe that many of our successes, crises, and events that occur in our life, happen on purpose and it is all written. It is our reaction, and our ability to maximize opportunity and potential, that will prove weather a meeting or occurrence was in vain or if it will blossom into something great.

Everything can not be easy in this world. For those really extraordinary things in life I know you have to put in the work before the rewards come in. You can be on top of the world one minute and plummet in seconds due to lack of preparation and terrible work ethic.

Sometimes opening your mouth, stepping out on a limb and sharing your thoughts with a stranger can lead to some pretty amazing steps towards your life's work. As they say "A closed mouth never gets fed"...

Share......GIVE.....and you shall receive.

Have a wonderful Tuesday!

I am thankful for the strangers I have met.


Thursday, November 19, 2009

Feet planted in the ground..Thinking on a higher plane.

Are we really afraid of what we don't know and understand? Is it fair to say that we get a little funny feeling in our stomach when we walk into brand new situations, with no prior knowledge of the environment, or people or circumstance that make that up. I notice many people, forgo "trying" to accomplish many things because of this fear.

It is safe to say that the human condition is built on being comfortable, once a comfort level is reached in relationships, career, and everyday life, we try to hold on to that unconsciously. We don't think of ruffling the feathers of what makes us feel secure, confident, and in a state of being able to predict our next step.

The downfall of this is we basically end up watching days, months and years fly by before our eyes and we feel time has been wasted. We then beat up on ourselves for not being more proactive and doing the things that really make us shine. Taking a risk and finding the one other person in this world that completes you and makes you feel like new love every single day. We don't allow ourselves to meet new people because we have known the ones in our lives for years. We don't go to the supermarket to buy healthy food and cook at home we rather speed off to the drive way and get something fast and quick, that does not require our energy to prepare.

I started to notice a long time ago that the way we "upkeep" our self and our things are a huge reflection of who we are feeling on the inside. If we organize and constantly clean out everything around us and evaluate our steps and moves, pushing ourselves to attain the short and long term goals we have set, we live on purpose and we give greater meaning to our existence.

Be well! XOXOXO!

Tuesday, November 17, 2009


Love me or leave me alone! Respect me for my opinion and what moves me to do the actions that I choose.

I am a woman! I am love! I am a mother and I am fly! Sometimes I find it hard to find the right words to put into the universe to touch the right people and to get my message across....I hold myself accountable and responsible for the thoughts that I place upon your mind as you read the words.

I am a grateful receiver of the love that you all give me each day. Some call me spoiled "Dee you get whatever you want always" looks easy from the outside...I understand. My struggle is yours. We all are trying to be more than we were yesterday!

I am beautiful and yes I know it. I don't need to walk down the street and hear a million guys try to tell me that for me to know it. I am 100% in love with myself and damn it feels good. I do not need a man to validate that even though I am fortunate enough to have ....

I love my life! It was created for me and given to me to utilize in the best way possible. To shine my light and be a sense of inspiration for all...I know this.. and I will commit to doing it as much as I can.

I love my family...and the blood that runs through my veins..I am descendants of royalty this I you know where you derived from? How far your blood runs and where it started??? if not....look into it. Carry out your purpose .your mission,

Speak and say what you wish! Always! BE BOLD..LIVE WITH PRIDE and NEVER dim your light...someone may need it who is in the dark!



Thursday, November 12, 2009

Happy 5th Birthday to MY Greatest Gift...

So today marks the birthday of my little Girl, who is turning 5, and I am filled with emotions. I wanted to share a poem I wrote about her the first week she came a dedication to her on her 5th birthday.

MooMoo -- What is that?

That is the nickname I chose to call one of my treasures - one of the most profound, meaningful and remarkable beings in existence - My daughter.

She lights up my interior, one look onto her eyes and you will be beaming too...

She as cute as a button and smart as a whip, from her stinky diapers to the dribble on her bottom lip.

She is made from something that cannot be defined or explained,

God placed her in my care so her purpose wont go in vain...

Oh he knows her family wouldn't allow such things...

He knew he had to send only the best of the bunch,

DeAsia Divyne Bradley was built for greatness - and that train came right on time.

Thank you for my Treasure.

LOVE YOU MOOMOO! Happy Birthday!

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Mary Mary Quite does your garden grow?

Who are you? Know really. One day I see you say this, the next I see you do something else. One day you are surrounding yourself with wolves, the next with sheep. Will the REAL you please stand up.

This question comes up many times for me with various people in my world. Yes, people are constantly evolving, as they should, but let us all hope and pray that the evolution is positive and for the good. I am seeing more and more people evolve backwards. They surround themselves with people who are not a reflection of their greatness, talent and potential,which leads them to participating in activities that are not a reflection of who they truly are.

Usually this would not be a concern of yours, after all, your friend is a grown adult who can make their own decisions...right?

But...what happens when you genuinely care and you want to see better for that person?

I have watched this same behavior happen often more recently in my life. It is hard to try to understand why or what causes people to say one thing and do the opposite but you can control those type of people in your world. You have to be responsible for your life, and that includes who you allow to permeate your circle and play a part in your life.

All I can do is say live by example. Keep your word, and live in accordance to what makes you happy and your life. If other people are not on your same page any more...then be courageous enough to give those relationships time and space to become what they are. Stay focused and on YOUR track.


Tuesday, November 3, 2009

Take two and call me in the morning ......

Why is it so hard to stay consistent with our health? Why can't we opt not to over indulge, over eat, snack and binge and stay on our vitamin game. When we are fine and things are great we don't have a care in the world...not until sickness or illness strikes.

We then want to reevaluate everything we put into our mouths, what activities we choose to partake in, how often we should be going to the gym, what vitamins we need more of and the list goes on and on. We need to think about this all the time.

With all the swine flu and regular flu and stomach virus and various illnesses going on, it is causing many people's lives to come to a halt and deal with the reality that they may need to pay more attention to their health, and start investing in LIVING rather than falling victim to illness and disease.

Be committed to being healthy, eating right and giving your body some necessary movement which translates to exercise. Keep your word to your self, it will pay off in the long run.

If you have health, you probably will be happy, and if you have health and happiness, you have all the wealth you need, even if it is not all you want. ~Elbert Hubbard

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

Fighting Temptations...

"The grass is not always greener on the other side", that is what they say. I wont ever know the shade, tent, smell and feel of the grass if you never experienced it. If you never walked on it, you never rolled through it, you never played Frisbee on it on a sunny day. You never even maintained the grass, kept it low. How can you truly say that the grass isn't greener?

I have said time and time again that I believe experience is the best teacher. Always! I have recently been seeing and watching people sacrifice good opportunities, and great relationships because they are curious about what life is like on the other side of the fence. is the stipulation. Even though I think that it is important that you experience life and go with your gut, it is extremely important that you do not let GLUTTONY and SELFISHNESS be the reason why you do it.

There is a big difference between the young lady who has a great, great, guy who makes it his mission in life to make sure that she is good. He makes her feel like a queen, helps her when she needs help, comforts her when she needs it, caters to her needs, respects her, in tune with her emotionally, and spiritually and is an all around great addition to who she is.

Compare this to the woman who stays in a relationship with a man who she hardly sees, who has to make an appointment to spend time with her man. A man who makes her and her needs an option. Does not cater to her mentally, spiritually, or emotionally. Makes her feel like she is just another one.

Which scenario is worth taking a test drive if another person or opportunity comes though. I can say that I would never ever tell someone who is unhappy, even if they were in a relationship not to remain OPEN to the possibilities of what you want in your life if it is clearly not present.

Unfortunately, what is happening is people who are in some pretty great relationships are not respecting them. They are stepping out to see if they can get more...they are interested in being GREEDY and not being in a state of gratitude with the person who is in their lives, who doe not deserve to be betrayed.

I think it is a sad situation when you have everything that you NEED and WANT and you still refuse to fight off the urge to explore more. At what expense do you hurt the next person? Do you even care? It seems that some of us will just never ever be satisfied.

Before you decide to break that person's heart and make a deposit into your own karma..think....How much your neighbor wish they had someone to love and grow with as you already have.

Have a wonderful day!!!!

Thursday, October 22, 2009

Made in the U.S.A.

Look at the tag of anything you are wearing right now...go on..I will give you time. Mine says "Italy" but...point is I guarantee you find something that says "Made in China, Cambodia, Paris, Indonesia"...or made someplace other than here. This is usual and should not surprise you, since we have accepted and realize that..that is just "the way it is".

What may surprise you, and what you may not consciously be aware of, is the fact that even though most of everything you own and wear is foreign made, YOU are not. America has done a fantastic job in designing you and keeping you in line with most of the absurdities that they have created and pretty much trained you to believe.

I came to this conclusion in a discussion yesterday and by simply listening to music. I love music. It is one of my greatest loves. I love the way a singer touches me with their gift, to speak to the inner me and lift me up, transcend moods and allow me to be in a state of temporary bliss. I appreciate talent and I appreciate when someone uses their raw, god given talent towards humanity.

Then it happens. You hear something from what you love, in this case being music, and it just brings you an epiphany. I'm going through my email and I open this new song from Rhianna and it literally butchered my spirit, it rained on my expectations and it made me ask..."Why is she selling millions"? Then I answered my own question...because they told us to like her and so it will be. Who are they? The "suits" that be. The decision makers, the ones who run it all.

Ask yourself this..If you heard one of Rhianna songs one time...and that was it...would you run to hear it again...compared to hearing a real vocalist? I guess if you listen to the radio all day, then you are forced to believe that this song is great and she is fabulous and you love it because they play it every hour on the hour. WHY? because it is part of the program.

There are some of us who have always been smarter than to go for the "okie doke" and co-sign nonsense when it is presented to us (we can date back to Harriet Tubman) many do fall for it? How many of us just go with the in and day out...liking what they tell us to like, listening to what they tell us to listen to, reading the garbage (OK, PEOPLE, etc.) they tell us to read, and the worst one.. WATCHING what they tell us to watch.

Who would have known that Rhianna would provoke such serious thoughts and theories. Here is a young lady who is known as one of the USA's largest singers/pop stars, yet, she clearly cannot sing (I stand firm by that), she cannot dance (which has always been a huge disappointment since she is from Barbados, and I had high hopes for the "Pon de replay" video), and she has no stage presence. She is simply just... the chosen one. If I am wrong...please prove it. I always welcome healthy debate.

I have never even seen her do anything GREAT other than what someone else orchestrated her to do..hence her fashion and style...which I will be the first to say is through the roof. She has also, sung many hit songs that were very well written by others, but still demonstrated no vocal talent. She was chosen to be who she is..and that she has done...and done well.

My point and where I am going with this is....start to PAY ATTENTION to who you are and the things YOU like, not what THEY say is hot, good, or worthy. If you do not know yourself and take time to really get to know you OUTSIDE of the programs that have been running since the day you were born, i.e. Radio, TV, Politics, Bureaucracies, Music, Movies...every single one of these things have a subliminal message to keep you following the program. Eventually, you will just be a product manufactured, as so many of these youth are becoming. They are not being raised by their parents..they are being raised by this society and it's non-sense.

Can you imagine what it would be like for us to not to have had a Ella Fitzgerald, Don Hathaway, Patti La belle, ARETHA, Etta JAMES!, WHITNEY, Marvin..AL live hard core sing to your bones get sore SINGERS! I can't imagine..but yet, my daughter is growing up in the generation of Rhianna...and this is supposed to be acceptable?

OK bringing this back....

I am in no way saying that every single thing we see and hear is bad, that would be false...but the ratio of what is good to what is over the top is clearly outbalanced and it is your responsibility to know the difference and educate yourself. If not for yourself, then for your children, or future children.

I constantly push myself to read books of my own interest, and that can broaden my insight past what the media constantly chooses to tell me. I push myself to not watch TV all the time, I push myself to have a conversation with my daughter about whatever she wants to talk about, even when its been a looog day. I push myself to listen to other types of music and my own music library instead of the radio. I push myself to engage in stimulating, thought provoking conversations about issues that are prevalent in my world, and my friends and families lives. I push myself. How hard do you push?

If we don't push ourselves then who will? Not all of us are blessed to have a constant coach on us to try to stay consistent and focused. This country makes it HARD to live in sincerity, compassion, and to live authentic. It's a start to simply push yourself.

"Our lives begin to end the day we become silent....about things that matter"


Tuesday, October 20, 2009

We are each other's inspiration!

I have never been shy about praising my fellow sisters! No matter what age, race, or place you come from...If I see a beautiful woman I say "Damn, she is HOT"! If I like your ensemble I say "Wow, work it girl"! If I see your talent and you demonstrate it so gracefully and effortlessly I Thank you and I tell you "You are Dope".

I have been blessed to know and have some pretty amazing, creative, talented, strong and gorgeous sisters in my life! We may not all be close as cousins, I may see you once every season, we may talk every full moon..but you know its ALL love and I am sure to tell you every now and then THANK You for being a dynamic contrition to my world as it Me.

Today I received an email from a young lady I have known since I was 13. She has always been full of life, and has turned out to be an exceptional poet and writer...I give thanks to her for this piece that she emailed me today, because little does she made me smile and found its place to me through its significance.

She has welcomed me to share: ENJOY....

MISS POLAY (Nia Crooks) here's to you....

Black curtains moving about amongst the sills of my bedroom windows
Dark spirits circling about
Again I ask self, what did I dream about?
A new day, a fresh start
Clean sheets of white paper to doodle upon
What's wrecking this brain of mine?
Chest full of emptiness and not a happy heart beat in sight
What's going on in the inner Ms. Crooks today that I pray doesn't lead into tonight
I ran away from yesterday & made it all the way to today
So my past isn't making me feel this way
Something or some things are missing this day
God grab my hand and take this feeling away
The more of "ME" is acting less
What will be the avenue of my next step
My Sgt. Green Eyes asked, what am I gonna do with this life?
I didn't say this, but my answer was to just be his wife
Who is he, I laugh @ self
My purpose lately is just to have a fixed health
The crazy spree I've spirled down surgery after surgery the body of a broken clown
Oh wait, its the trial that's raping my brain
Taking the stand from the taxi hit & to a judge & jury I must explain
Nerves of nervousness is what's clouding my brain
Hoping to have the perfect testimony & try not to appear insane
When a overwhelming feeling strikes I blank brain
Sometimes I forget my very own name
Loving that Dad & Gramps will be by my side
Wait..., in my dream I saw my Holy side
So this is not emptiness I feel or a bad spirit circling my room
Its good energy delivered to me by, you know whom
God you're a silly Goose sometimes
You wreck my brain then make me rewind
Its time to fill up with your good graces
And get ready to experience new places & spaces
So its not nothingness, doubt, hurt, pain or negative I feel
Its the feeling of being healed
The sins that I commit wash away over night
And in the morning God gives me a new chance to fight
Amaya still belly swimming as I smirk my face
Happiness decorating all over the place
See this is why I write so I can fill my tank
With words from the heart and my purity place
The "ME" you may know, maybe so many "ME"'s
But the one thing I can prove is only my God holds my hearts key
He opened it up today and my writers block stepped down
These are the words from a frown turned upside down


Let it resonate....

Love you all.. HAPPY TUESDAY!

Thursday, October 15, 2009

The road less traveled....

I pretty much believe that the best teacher is experience. Ever since we were babies and were learning to crawl and walk, we knew if we ran too fast, we would fall and bump our heads, so we slowed down, and mastered our steps, alleviating the pain.

Why or when did the concept of not experiencing pain, hardship, and disappointment get ruled out in our learning process as adults?

I never understood why people would get at others when they told them not to do something and they did it anyway. How can anyone know the severity of their actions if they never experienced it? Isn't that how the person telling you not to do something learned?

I attest that struggle and sacrifice bear bountiful fruit. It is an amazing and gratifying time to come out of a storm and see the sun shining and the pastures green. Life can be so extremely heavy and non-inspiring at times, making us doubt and second guess the power and strength that resides in us to overcome any and everything.

We sometimes forget that NOTHING is too big and would not be presented to us if it was. There is a lesson and a test in everything. Pay attention to the language of your life. Understand it...master it and take it seriously. You would be surprised at how many of us are living with no plan. No goals to attain. Just waking up and doing the same thing over and over, expecting different results than the day before. That is called insanity.

The day you stop envisioning more than what you already have and trying to go to places you have never been, is the first sign of living in mediocrity, and accepting it.

I have heard so many times in this week alone from a couple of people "I wish I was in school, I need to go back, I miss it" GO BACK! LEARN! PUSH YOURSELF...and don't tell me you don't have the money to go because if nothing else in this country..anyone can go to school and not have to PAY upfront for it. So stop lying to yourself. Make it happen. Do SOMETHING.

I am currently in one of the most challenging times in my life getting my Master degree but I love every second of it. I am learning new things, meeting interesting people and following a path that satisfies a desire I have had for a long time.

The less traveled road is never appealing and wont be the easiest to endure but once you reach the destination...the view is amazing!

Live with someone recently said to me!

Have a wonderful and blessed weekend!

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

RESPECT...not just a 7 letter word.

RESPECT is earned not given. This can be debatable by some..some would say that why not show certain people "automatic" respect if they are a certain someone in your life. Like your mom, dad, child's parent, in-laws, and elders are just SUPPOSE to get a certain level and amount of respect when it comes to who they are in your life.

This should be the case but what happens is the people who hold these titles can do some of the most disheartening, disrespectful, cold things to you and it can really tear at your spirit and soul. Making it extremely hard to show them any sort of "automatic respect".

What is right is right and what is wrong is wrong. Why should we endear the blatant disregard and stupidity that so many of these people put on display. It is a hard question to answer and many of us would have to take it by a case by case situation.

Assess the "titles" in your life and ask yourself seriously if they are worthy of Respect?

Just a thought...I'm going somewhere with it soon....

Have a great Tuesday! Love the Life you have...while you have it.

Thursday, October 8, 2009

Relate, Regroup & Release,

As I drove back to my house today after getting some breakfast, I noticed a couple in a Maxima. The young man was in the passenger seat and the girl was driving. As she pulled up to the front of the train station, she got out and so did he, in which she held the door and he got into the drivers seat. It was obvious she was on her way to work and he was taking her car, to go about his day.

The problem for me was not in the fact that she was basically giving him her car while she was at work, but how when she got out he didn't even acknowledge her. No goodbye kiss, no hug, not even a "have a great day". That was the problem.

So many times..and more often than usual I find my ladies OVER extending themselves to the men in their lives. They do, do and do some more...not receiving the littlest reciprocation from their men. I have seen situations where the man does not even get up and TRY to earn money to help the woman who breaks her back day in and day out to make sure the bills are paid. What sort of life is this?

I am not saying that we should live in old school traditions in all areas in our lives but a man should want to provide and add on for his lady and family (if they have one) and if he does not, and you are doing EVERYTHING then where is the team work or strength in that. To make matters worst, when she is out here bettering herself and her life, his attitude is very non-chalet and he does not praise you and make you feel appreciated as he should.

I felt so bad for the young lady today because it was as if she was waiting for her guy to do something...say something...and he just pulled off. As a woman, no words had to be said, no background information had to be given, no was an unsaid disappointment, and let down of expectations..something I believe all of us women have felt at some point in our lives from the one we love.

I pray for my women and my girls who give give and give to men who don't deserve it. So for those who take our nurturing, our catering nature and our selflessness for granted, regroup and release them. They do not deserve the goodness that God works through you.

Find someone who is a reflection of the light you give off and don't be afraid to be alone either. It is when we finally let go of something, that the most beautiful blessings are welcomed unexpectedly into our lives.


Tuesday, October 6, 2009


Is it OK to say that I love me some beautiful black women! No I am not a Lesbian. I just love women who embrace their womaness and feel free to be the woman that they are naturally.

There is something about the scent of a woman. The touch of a woman. The kiss of a woman. The hug, the advice, the essence. It gets even more fun and I am in full gratitude when a woman embraces her femininity. She loves to be clean. Smell good, Dress sharp, have flawless hair, nails, and posture.

It does not matter what size you are. We come in all shapes. Small, Petite, Tall, slim, round, is a beautiful thing to compliment and flatter who you are. It baffles me to see women who do not put an ounce at all into their appearance and make an effort to try to be the fly, powerful, queen that is in her. That does not happen by playing small at any level.

Make noise with your ambition. Let laziness and lack of motivation never catch you.

Make regular deposits into YOU!

Love the skin you are in!!!!


Thursday, October 1, 2009

Evolution is necessary...

Thank goodness just like the world in which we live, we as people evolve. If I was still the same person I was 10 years ago, who am I kidding, even 5 years ago, I might as well pack up my things and live in a hut in Tibet. I have grown, evolved and accelerated my life so much, with my own doing, that I am proud to be in the space I am in. I can say I have grown and committed myself to making moves with my life and the direction I want it to go.

It is so easy to be trapped in a life of habit. Habits that promote activities and occurrences in your life that are not in your best interest. Not all of our habits are always bad, but we might not realize by overindulging in some of these habits, it can do more harm than anything.

Surrounding ourselves around certain people and their habits can cause problems for us as well. Shouldn't it be crucial for us to constantly evolve and introduce new things into our worlds for us to thrive? New information, new books, new people, positive people, people making a difference, people following through with their goals people who are about more than just themselves.

Evolution is key to your existence. Life keeps going, moving, reaching and we must stay in the race. Lets always go against the "No's" and make whatever we want happen for ourselves. Who says we cant?

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Shut it off!

We live in a world that provides us with the curse of constant distraction. There is just something always ON. TV, Radio, Cellphones, Computers, etc. The list of course gets higher and higher when you live in places that are more prone to never closing their eyes like "NYC" and other fast pace metropolises. There is soo much going on externally that we forget how to tap into the richness that is within ourselves. We forget out to just sit and listen and be with ourselves. We forget how to turn off our phones for just 2 minutes. We forget that the most important connection we need (the GOD within us) requires our attention more than anything else, because through that we are able to achieve the purpose we are here to do. Through that connection we achieve success and greatness and know what to do with it.

I recently heard a a very powerful message about this exact thing, and it moved me. It made me realize that I am part of the distraction, and guilty of falling into the same distractions every day. So I asked myself, why is it so hard for me to just FOCUS on one thing at a time? Why do I have to engage in the very things that may be stimulating for the time being but do not increase my productivity and push me closer to the priorities that will put me where I need to be?

This becomes harder and harder for those like myself who always have some place to go, some party to support someone in, somebody requesting your company here and there and having the desire to want to make everyone you love happy. It comes to a point where you just have to say "NO".

It is imperative you take time to be with you, to meditate, to expand on everything going on in your life mentally and be able to get the answers from yourself. I am learning that when I need to know something best for me, it is not going to "ask someone their opinion or advice" it is shutting out the world and sitting still and listening to the little voice that we all have.

The little voice speaks so loud when you dedicate the stage to just it. NO SHARING with the cellphone, the TV, the Radio, the Internet, the Socialites...JUST YOU!

Make a difference in your life and be proud to say you were responsible for it. The difference will pour out of you and touch someone else.

Have a marvelous blissful Tuesday!

Love .....

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

FRIENDS...How many of us have them?

I say Thank you to those who I can call my FRIENDS and never second guess it. Those who have always stood by me and supported me, never said anything to me that they knew might be hurtful but say it anyway...never defame my character behind my back, reaches out to me to check on me and my family, comes to functions that I throw for my loved ones, Give me daps ...and give me hugs...This is for you!

I appreciate authenticity.

I appreciate those who do not have jealousy and hate running through their makeup, and think it is hidden...I can see it.

I appreciate the times that you just reach out to just say hello.

I appreciate the advice that you have given with my best interest in mind.

I appreciate you sacrificing your time which belongs to you, to be by my side.

I appreciate all the late night chats we have indulged in because we just wanted to keep the joke going.

I appreciate the countless meals that we have enjoyed together.

I appreciate the gifts that you have bestowed on me throughout the years..even when it wasn't of material nature.

I appreciate you telling me how much I mean to you in your life.

I appreciate the wisdom that you have taught me without you even knowing it.

I appreciate you searching for the right words, because you want me to get the message but you want me to take it the right way.

I appreciate your respect.

I appreciate your smile.

I appreciate your prayers that have included me in them.

I appreciate your good intentions.

I appreciate the essence of you... MY FRIEND!

Have a wonderful day and tell your Real True Friends...How much they mean to you!


Thursday, September 17, 2009


We are human, living in a world of distraction. We turn left there is noise, We turn right there is chaos..We close our eyes, our phone rings. We sleep...we may dream in color of what is to be...We are human on a plane of uncertainty.

It is not my battle to fight, nor is it yours. We take everything sooo seriously. WHY? That bill needs to get paid, That event is happening next week I need to go. I have not visited him or her in a long time I need to go. I need those shoes. I need that bag. I need a new man. I need a fly girl. I need a house. I need that car. I need to go on vacation. I need a new job. I need..I need..I need!

I tried an experiment one day with some people who for the record, had no idea they were being party of my observation. I carried my day on as normal and whoever reached out to me on that day...they were part of the hypothesis. What did I hypothesize? That I would hear them either express discomfort, complain or speak of all the things they DON'T have but NEED or WANT. Hear them speak of everything that is not right.

It becomes overwhelming. Not once did someone say I am so grateful and happy for what I have in my life. Most times people don't take a moment out of their day to just give thanks for IT ALL. No matter how troubling times can get...Is it ever really that bad?

Listening to all of the ranting an complaining makes me feel 10 lbs. heavier of course because I am soaking up all that negatively charged energy, but I am conscious through it all, and made the conscious decision to respond positively and upbeat. You would be shocked at how your high enthused energy will eventually break down that person's negative ball. It is funny to watch because it is as if they are a fish out of water, and wont know how to move once you respond opposite to the way they are.

I am too blessed...too happy and to GRATEFUL for all the wonderful threads that make up this life of mine. I will not sulk, feel beat up, think pessimistic, feel conquered, feel hopeless, faithless, or helpless. I am a child of God. I was put here to carry out a purpose and it shall be fulfilled. I am, thankful for IT ALL!

I read this passage one day out of a book written by Maya Angelou (who I adore) and she says:

"The ship of my life may or may not be sailing on calm and amiable seas. The challenging days of my existence may or may not be bright and promising. Stormy or sunny days, glorious or lonely nights, I maintain an attitude of gratitude. If I insist on being pessimistic, there is always tomorrow. Today I am blessed."

And blessed YOU shall be....

Have a wonderful weekend!!!

Speak your gratitude OUTWARD! Wear it on your sleeves!!!! It looks good on you.

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Where does your ambition lie?

Drifting...through space...existing...just to are just are are watching the world happen...but what are you making happen?

There are so many people who watch. There is this old proverb that my dad once again used to drill in my head “Some people make things happen, some watch things happen, while others wonder what has happened"? I could almost hear him yelling at me saying "WHICH CATEGORY ARE YOU"? And looking at me fiery mad.

I knew the answer to that question, and everyone else if asked would most definitely say they do not fall into category 2 or 3, but you would be AMAZED at how many that actually DO fall into these categories. Ask yourself this:

If you are always just hanging out watching other people's movements, at your job with no motivation or concern just school, just because your parents want you to go, maintaining relationships just because you don't have the guts to wonder why you are holding on to something that does not contribute to your growth...then you might fall into this category.

Why are you not taking a proactive approach to your future and what you want for yourself. Why are you recycling each and every day and living on repeat. Why not MAKE something happen TODAY! Try something that you never tried..Dare to stand out of the crowd..Disregard what everyone else thinks for a will be surprised at the outcome. Dance to the beat of your own Maracas!

Have direction and purpose in ALL you would be surprised at how far it will get you. And let the chips fall.

Enjoy your Tuesday for it is a GIFT!


Tuesday, September 8, 2009

Accountability....outside of YOU

You ever watched someone close to you go through some pretty hard times. They are always down, depressed and have low energy. You pretty much get used to them being "that way". We start to justify them being miserable and allowing them to be that way around us and everyone else. We trick ourselves in to believing that its OK for them to be upset and complain about every single thing because the world always breaks down on their shoulders. They never get a break. Life is just so hard for just them.


We are just as much as fault for them being that way if we choose to keep these people's company and don't encourage them as much as we can to "try something else". My dad used to tell me growing up..and its a famous Quote by Benjamin Franklin. "The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results". You CANNOT expect to see differences in your life that you want to change, just because you said it. You have to go about things differently and actively change up the way you have done things in the past. You have to change your way of thinking as well. Switch up your paradigm and move with it.

It's almost guaranteed that the things that the people in our life who seem to have a hard time go through is caused by no one else but them. They might not realize it because they are so focused on the issues, and sometimes it helps when those around them can offer honesty and insight into what they see from standing on the outside.

When you make the decision to ensure that if you can help it at all, you will make sure this person has fun, live life and try to get the most out of it, then you are doing your part as a friend, a relative, a companion. When you make the decision to encourage them to do more, and to assist them when they need it you are playing your part.

It is a great feeling to see someone you love smile, laugh, play and be one with the moment, and to know you played a part in making it happen. It is also a great accomplishment for anyone to witness progress, no matter what form it comes in.

Have a great Tuesday! Lend a hand to your friends...

Thursday, September 3, 2009


There is this Philospher and Psychologist, called William James that once said " The art of being wise is knowing what to overlook". How fitting and true this is.

How many times can we think of when someone got under our skin, did something out of character, made us feel belittled and put a damper on our day over non-sense? It happens way more often than we would like...and the worst part is it can happen with those closest to us. This presents a dilemma because when someone is close to you and shares an important part of our life, we have to be wise about "which battles we fight".

In relationships, this is more common, and married couples will be the first to tell you "choose your battles wisely". WHY? because many times when you are fuming and red at something at that moment, once you give yourself a moment to cool down and to think about the situation, you realize it was not worth the time and effort to begin with.

Our circumstance, mind frame, and external forces can sometimes play a role in the way we receive certain information. It is in our best interest to never react off of initial emotion. In the heat of the moment you can allow things to shoot from your mouth that you can never take back, and if enough words are spoken venomously it can put a dent in the lifeline of the relationship you have with that person.

Stop, Breathe and Think about how you wanna handle your next hiccup. Is it worth overlooking or pulling out the big ones? The decision we make in the moment will affect our tomorrow's. Life is all a series of our best moves....what is your next one?

RESPECT...not just a 7 letter word.

RESPECT is earned not given. This can be debatable by some..some would say that why not show certain people "automatic" respect if they are a certain someone in your life. Like your mom, dad, child's parent, in-laws, and elders are just SUPPOSE to get a certain level and amount of respect when it comes to who they are in your life.

This should be the case but what happens is the people who hold these titles can do some of the most disheartening, disrespectful, cold things to you and it can really tear at your spirit and soul. Making it extremely hard to show them any sort of "automatic respect".

What is right is right and what is wrong is wrong. Why should we endear the blatant disregard and stupidity that so many of these people put on display. It is a hard question to answer and many of us would have to take it by a case by case situation.

Assess the "titles" in your life and ask yourself seriously if they are worthy of Respect?

Just a thought...I'm going somewhere with it soon....

Have a great Tuesday! Love the Life you have...while you have it.

Tuesday, September 1, 2009

Ignorance Demon is running rampid.....look to your left..

As a new season enters and is approaching...It's time to pack away the old and pull out the new. This can apply to clothes, environments, activities and people. I am in the process of purging people from my life who do not have any place there. They may have had a place at some point, but clearly they have made it obvious they no longer do.

Life and opportunity is of the moment and what time do we have to waste with those who are negative, inconsiderate, insensitive, and non ambitious. In addition to having issues that are so deeply rooted in their well being that they may have some trouble seeing their flaws and understanding why you have elevated from who they choose to be.

New season's bring new blessings, if you welcome them in. Be who you are naturally and deflect the ignorance demon that is bound to try to creep into your space on the daily. This demon can possess anyone and anything and try to cloud your vision, but you know better. You can spot it a mile away and you should be able to walk away from it EASILY because you know who you and it's soo much more than what is being presented to you.

Be Wise..Remain the bright spot in the room, and live your dreams out loud, you may need to loose some people and things along the way....but as they say "Pack lighter you get further".

Happy Tuesday!!!

Thursday, August 27, 2009

What will you be remembered for?

How long do you stay in a position before you realize your time there has gone stale?

For some reason recently, many people have been asking me for "career move advice", obviously there is no surprise that many people have been let go from their jobs, and re-evaluating what to do next, but, what about the fortunate people who have not lost their jobs. The people who are sitting in a position that they have been in for years and they are ready to be promoted but "due to the economy" are afraid to ask for a promotion.

I think this entire "economy" situation has been a mind manipulator. Yes there is no denying that the economy and the money that has been available has been limited...BUT that has nothing to do with what you are worth and what you deserve, and to allow the state of this economy to affect your ability to know and believe that, is inexcuasable for chasing your dreams. Self worth BEATS Net Worth.

There IS money out here and you CAN get some if you are dedicated and committed to allowing your talents (whatever they be)to shine and you sell yourself. You can be the most talented, singer, writer, dancer, stylist, administrator, etc. whatever it is at the end of the day, you have to make someone believe that you are too. You cannot have all this talent and not market it for yourself and then get madd when opportunities do not come your way. There isn't anyone who is capable of helping you, just sitting at home, thinking about you. You have to make yourself visible, noticeable and go for what you want vigorously.

Now if you are reading this and you don't know if it applies to you then ask yourself this...

1- Have you been doing the same exact thing for more than 2 years with no salary increase or promotion?

2- Do you HATE going in to your job everyday, and know EXACTLY what you want to do, and it isn't your current job?

3- Is there any positions at your job that you want and know you are the best fit for but have not applied for it out of FEAR?

If you can say YES to any of these three questions, then you need to stop making excuses for living in a mediocre, non-ambitious space and go after what you want.

There is no excuse!!!!

One of America's Original Successful Authors, Robert Collier once said "Success is the sum of small efforts, repeated day in and day out."

Read that quote and think about what you do DAY IN AND DAY OUT.

P.S. I am sitting here watching all this coverage on Ted Kennedy and his life.

It is sad that he has passed on but I see a man who came to this world, served his purpose and left his mark.

He will always be remembered for what he created for himself while he was here. He made an impact...and it is just more affirmation for me that this is our only mission.

What will you be remembered for?

Have a productive Thursday & a safe Weekend!!!


Tuesday, August 25, 2009

In simple form....

Is it my fault that I embraced you with open arms and smiles every time we shared the same space? Listening to your stories about your tired man, and how happy you were. Giving you advice about what your next step should be. Sharing a hard laugh with you and facial gestures as we both tried to figure out why we were laughing. Hey....not my fault. That is just me.

I welcomed you into my world because you were welcomed in by someone close to me. Maybe I can be at fault for that. Why couldn't I tell that you were a jealous, envious negative person? Then again, we all do not see what we have no knowledge of. If we had a radar for all the nonsense that people had under their sleeve we would never have relationships. a way should I be disgusted? Should any of us be disappointed when a person shows another side of who they are that is not what we like or expected.

The truth is most of the people we know don't even understand or know themselves. They have a tendency to be weak and will go along with what everybody else is doing. Second what everyone else is saying. Laugh at something everyone else may find funny and not take a stand and say that this is what I fear they will stand out and not fit in. I cannot identify with this person but I know they exist, and that is the balance in the world.

So...I have chosen and learned that it is not my place nor duty to allow the result of being upset, disappointed or mad when someone shows me a side of them that I am not used to nor like. I roll with the punches, and I smile for the battle is not mine and as the good book says "forgive them, for they know not what they do". (Luke 23:3)

Enjoy your day!

Be yourself.

Thursday, August 20, 2009

P.S. I LOVE YOU! (Yea you)...

Only you can make me feel like I am floating when I am really taking steps. You send me on an all time high, I don't need a drink, when I am with you. I can take you all in and its good enough for me. You give me the space to be me. You allow me to be free, to move as I like. You are like the sax that lies underneath my rhythm...what would it be without that SAX?

I think when you were created from perfection that is, it was in your destiny to meet me at the moment we did. It was only right that we had lived such drastically different lives with drastic differences and come to the same crossroad to align and be a reflection of what the other needed.

What type of emotion can make you spit out such infectious words, get a tingling sensation up your spine and make your heart spoon? There is something about the feeling you get when you are in love that makes everything feel a little bit more alive, everything you hears sounds a little bit clearer, and everything you see is a bit more beautiful than it was before.

Love can put you in a high and keep you on a high, and nobody but you and the other person can relate to it. You cannot tell your friend..."hit this", "Sip this", "try this", because the love you are IN is made custom for you and that person. NO SHARING! All they can do is get a whiff of the goodness that drips off of your spirit when they are in your presence, and if that is your true friend, that will be enough for them. They will be sooo happy and elated for your joy that, that is all they will need.

LOVE is something wonderful. I think of Love and I think of Stevie when he said in "AS":

Did you know that true love asks for nothing
Her acceptance is the way we pay
Did you know that life has given love a guarantee
To last through forever and another day
Just as time knew to move on since the beginning
And the seasons know exactly when to change
Just as kindness knows no shame
Know through all your joy and pain
That I'll be loving you always
As today I know I'm living but tomorrow
Could make me the past but that I mustn't fear
For I'll know deep in my mind
The love of me I've left behind Cause I'll be loving you always

Until the day is night and night becomes the day---ALWAYS
Until the trees and seas just up and fly away---ALWAYS
Until the day that 8x8x8 is 4---ALWAYS
Until the day that is the day that are no more
Did you know that you're loved by somebody?
Until the day the earth starts turning right to left---ALWAYS
Until the earth just for the sun denies itself
I'll be loving you forever
Until dear Mother Nature says her work is through---ALWAYS
Until the day that you are me and I am you---AL~~~~~~WA~~




Tuesday, August 18, 2009

Small Voice..BIG deal....

When it is all said in done, minus material things, minus our careers, minus our positions in the world, minus religion and minus race...we are simply human beings. I think many of us forget this...We are just that FIRST. A form of species. We are a species, an animal. We have the great abilities to create, invent and inspire unlike any other animal on the planet. We really are the only species on this planet that has so much freedom.

I experienced an interesting relationship 3 months ago with an individual that lasted a week...A WHOLE WEEK! It started off mellow and ended harshly. It was funny because our relationship really lasted a week! Why? Because I ended it and I was at peace with my decision. I had enough courage and wisdom to say this is just not going to work out anymore. I do not like the way you have been treating me on a HUMAN level, I do not like the way you speak to me on a HUMAN level, and I do not like the respect, concern and care you show me on a HUMAN level. So this has to be over.

Is it easy to do this? Absolutely not! The same way you can tell when something is just off in your body, or something is not quite right with your food, or you know you don't belong someplace but you stay anyway going against your gut, is the same way you know when a person just will not work and fit into your world. I have been the one who will force this sometimes for the benefits that may come from having someone in my life, but then you realize the detriment it causes in the long run is not worth it.

So what have I learned from that. ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS listen to your instinct and the small voice that speaks to you. I am blessed that mine talks so loud and clear that I sometimes have to close my eyes and say are tooo loud! Then some of us have that tiny voice going off all the time and you have learned to ignore it so well that it sounds like humming and it never works for you.

I believe that the little voice is the tunnel or the channel line between you and GOD, or whatever higher power you believe in. I believe that once you really take a minute and listen to it, you will find that the little voice will never ever steer you wrong and always has your best interest in mind.

We don't take enough time to be still and to listen to the messages that come all throughout the day. It takes discipline and will to really WANT to do this, but once you do it, it is soo worth it.

Be loyal to you, Stay True to you, and keep people, places and things out of YOU that are no good for your advancement in life. All you have is...YOU! When things happen can always look to yourself for why.

PAY ATTENTION while you are still goes by fast.


Happy Tuesday!!!

Thursday, August 13, 2009

Bag full of Foes?

How many people can you call on if you really was stuck in a jam? Would you be able to put your closest friends names in a hat and just pick one and feel sure knowing they would be there...or would you have to really carefully strategically think about who could I call in this time of need?

I think this is absolutely ridiculous when you have a nice group of close friends and not one of them is willing to try to assist you in your time of need. Many people will let their ego get in the way of them wanting to ask a favor from someone who they think to be a close friend, but why?

If you cannot ask your closest friends for favors without them being less than happy to do them, then why are they close to you? Most likely this type of friend is a selfish, pompous individual who is looking out for his or her own best interest at all times and you or anyone else just exists in their world.

I think it is healthy to learn to say NO to those who never seem to reciprocate your friendship. If you are always over-extending yourself, and making sure the relationship between the you two of you is cozy and fit then make room in your life for that person to show what they can do for the relationship as well.

If there is anything we know about "People", they will do exactly what you allow them to do. Start to set the standard high in your friendships as well as intimate relationships. If you don't set the tone for you and what is expected then who will. Blame yourself and yourself only when you are treated less than fair, disrespected, abused or mistreated in any shape or form. You allowed it to happen. Point blank.

Of course some people come from years of emotional abuse from childhood and their self-esteems are damaged inside out and they do not have that strong persona to shut down any non-sense from anyone. In this case, the time is now. Learn to stand strong and to be your number one fan.

People are so disposable its ridiculous. They love you today and hate you tonight. But if you are in love with yourself the way you won't miss it at all.

Enjoy your weekend and be amongst the living!


Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Learn to Love what you have while you have it.

We tend to hear "a good man is hard to find" but is that true?

I have met and know so many good men. The problem is that these good men are with women who are insecure, bitchy, naggers, complainers, and treat their men like they are toddlers in Pre-school. A man should always feel like a MAN! PERIOD. Unless he chooses otherwise. What is this new wave of treatment being bestowed upon men in relationships, where they allow their women to tell them how to act, what to say, what to do, where to go, when they can do it, how they can do it, what activities they can take part in, and what time they can be on their phones!

Don't get me wrong. RESPECT is RESPECT, and a good man will always respect the union he has with the woman he loves, but let him do him naturally and if he messes up...then he messes up, and that is to be dealt with accordingly. Do not discipline and guide a grown man to not be who he is naturally. What sense does that make? If I have to tell you how to love me and treat me, I could be alone.

This approach may appear a little "lackadaisical" to some women but it has been my experience that if you ever have to monitor and check on your man like you are getting a check cut from the Feds, then you maybe need to re-assess if you should be with that person at all. Something is clearly not right out the gate, and you will always feel that "Feeling" in your gut. So why force yourself to take it to the next level and check behind him, something is wrong with that picture.

Most times the man in this position is usually a really great, deserving guy who is not checking for the non-sense his woman thinks he is checking for, BUT, that woman has so much "triflarity" "insecurities" and "pyschonisms" (yes I made up some words for the purpose of this blog) that she causes her own sanity to slip away. The solution to the problem lies within her...not the man. She has to change herself!

The most bewildering part of this whole scenario is that the women in these relationships are never satisfied and complain about what their man is not doing. When they should ask themselves why would your man want to be excited about doing anything for anyone who is just a nagging, bitchy, negative ball of energy. You can't attract bees with no your man and let him live his life!

You may think you are on your job and there is nobody getting close to your man by your security efforts but guess what...he is unhappy inside and is waiting for the right outlet to let it all out and to be vulnerable to the opposite behavior you give off. You are pushing him away and making him feel imprisoned, restrained and unable to be him, and believe man wants to feel this way.

I can write 2 pages of names of men who come frustrated, and looking for advice from their crazed women, and the women have no clue how unhappy these men are. They do not know how if given the opportunity, the right woman can come and snatch their man up in a heartbeat, because she treats him right. And as the song goes, it comes as an epiphany.

Start appreciating the men in your life and treat them with respect, decency and admiration! Especially when they deserve it. What is wrong with you ..don't you know how many women wish they had a man who they could call THEIR OWN, and if you have one and you aren't loving him the right way...then remember she is waiting right there to show him what is really good.

Love the one's your with...especially when they deserve it!



Thursday, August 6, 2009

Do we RELATE? If not then this SHIP has sailed....

RE-LA-TION...SHIP. The words speaks for it self. We relate to ourselves very well. How we RELATE to another being can become tricky. Do we give ourselves selflessly, wholesome, and humbly or do we give scarcely, being conscious of how much we give, do we let them down with affection, admiration, love, support.

The relationships we foster over time with individuals sometimes loose the zest and life they once possessed and it disappears without you giving a second thought as to how to fix it. This is when you have given up and you are just co-existing. You never ever want to just "be" in anything..and not adding on in some way.

If you are in a relationship and I do not care HOW LONG it has been. You can have children, have a house, share assets, WHATEVER..if that person does not care enough to make an attempt to make the relationship between the two of you better then you two have nothing RELATE-ABLE any more and it is time for a new beginning.

I have never been one to settle for ANYTHING. I think this can be a blessing and a curse but at the end of it all, I can live with me and I am usually smiling more than frowning. I love myself way too much to stay in anything that is causing me discomfort and pain. So when I naturally see those in my life going through these emotions, yes it is very easy for me to say "MOVE ON". "Leave it alone" Let go...and LET GOD. Only because I know the long term benefit, and you will thank yourself later.

We make things more complicated than they need to be. We like to bring religion, morale, and all these other man made ideas into play when we know what we need to do in our hearts. We usually know the answer to what we need to do to make us happy and fulfill OUR destiny the way it should be, but we stall and we wait and we say its not the right time, and we take everyone's feelings and thoughts, along with what they are going to think into consideration before we actually DO what WE need to do.

Well I got news for you....Time is of the essence. Life is not promised and whatever you see for yourself, adhere to making it happen TODAY because your tomorrow may never come, and that is just the simple truth.

Live for you and your children if you have them. Go and chase every opportunity like it's your only mission in life. Get that career you always wanted, Get that man you always wanted, Let go of that man who treats you like an OPTION, Love the woman you have the right way before she gets its from some place else, Go have dinner with your closest girlfriend, Spend the day with your boys and just relax, Have a conversation with your parents, Ask your children how was their day and LISTEN. Be one with yourself and take time to listen to what is really going on in your brain.

BE EXTRA-ORDINARY....Being average is for the ordinary people.

Love you all!

Have a safe and marvelous weekend!


Tuesday, August 4, 2009

These shoes were made for walking....

I grew up hearing the phrase "What comes up must come down". Not only is this a known fact in physics, but can be applied all day, everyday in life. We feel like we are at the top for so long, living the life, everything is perfect, and then out the blue something can come and knock us off our throne and tell us "Now deal with this"! Life is full of unexpected events and surprises. Man, if I had a dime donated to me for every time life threw me a curve ball I could start a trust fund with the proceeds.

Of course it can be one of the most devastating and depressing times of your life when you work hard for something, look forward to something and bank on something to be a certain way and it just does not go so. How do you handle that? What do you do?

It is important to know that nothing is the end of the world. I don't care WHAT happens or what appears to be causing you grief. We have the power to change and make things happen the way we truly want and some time our decisions can be the ultimate reason of our demise.

Sometimes when you feel at your lowest point and you cry and you just feel like you have the weight of the world on your shoulders, just at the next moment a blessing comes through and wipes your tears away and makes everything so much better. You realize that you are not ever ever alone and that you will get what you need and what is for you in the time you can handle it.

I take so much pride in all that I have ever struggled through and gave blood sweat and tears for because it makes me so much stronger and helped me to walk around with an appreciation that you can't easily find. I am grateful for it all, and happy I am who I am. God lives through me and you too and nothing is never TOO much.


Thursday, July 30, 2009

Knowledge is POWER....STILL!

There was a time when you woke up, scratched your head, looked up the hall or to the next room, and your mom or dad was right there asking you "You hungry"? "What you doing today"? " How much you need"?

Then as if it crept up on you like a nasty winter are grown and expected to get it together FAST! Questions that come now are more like "When are you getting your own place?" "When are you going to get a job?" "The bills are due"? and then you find yourself asking someone else "How much THEY need"?

Adulthood creeps up and sticks on you like adhesive. This can be a beautiful, wonderful, liberating time OR it can be very stressful, depressing and upsetting if you haven't prepared yourself for it. I always give thanks everyday for my childhood and my family. My father and mother pushed me and stayed on top of me and my education like it was their only duty in life. In addition to having their constant motivation, my Aunts and my NANA were a constant reinforcement and motivation for me, telling me to be the best at EVERYTHING I did and telling me how great I was always!

This is extremely important for a child. I know so many young people who are turning into adulthood and who are IN adulthood and don't know what to do. They don't know where to turn, how to navigate in life because they never were encouraged by their family, or anyone for that matter, on how important it is that you lay a foundation for your future that is steadily approach fast!

I have been in school now for 22 years...and just recently I have been contemplating getting my PhD., because WHY NOT! I have not always been a FAN of going to school...and I must admit I did not always go for the best reasons. I am a social bug and during high school most of the time I looked forward to going everyday just to take my cozy spot with the rest of my friends who sat at the top of the social hierarchy. We came to school to dress, flaunt our perfectly framed bodies and talk talk talk. Passing classes was just something we decided to add on to the show. Because afterall, High School was a show!

It is not until now as I sit in my Masters program class that I give thanks a thousand times over for the endless nights my father sat up with me talking and drilling the importance of getting my education. He would tell me how people can strip me of alot of things but no one can EVER EVER take away the knowledge that I learn and acquire in my lifetime. How my knowledge will always set me apart from the rest, and my persistent and dedication to WANT to always push myself will take me far. He used to tell me "Yes Dee, looking good will get you in the door, and having some personality will get you further..but once you get there you have to sustain yourself..." Thank you DADDY! How many times have I LIVED those words and they have came true.

My point is this. School is NOT for everyone, and to be successful you don't ALWAYS have to have a degree must be committed to learning and adding on to your greater mind. You can self teach yourself. I know so many people, men especially, who have not gone to school but can tell you facts on topics from history to physics because they DECIDED to pick up a book and read and to expand their mind on their own time.

The man who picks up garbage everyday makes a great salary but the man who understands what happens to the garbage after its picked up and why it happens, has a greater appreciation for what he does. In other words, knowledge is POWER and your passport to livelihood in the new world. Believe it!

Our President is a grand example of an educated man whose intelligence green lighted and secured his spot without a doubt. Had that man lacked the intelligence, diligence, articulation and wisdom that he had, no way would he be where he is.

Always push yourself to go further, to READ, to learn more, to discover new things, to research what you don't know or understand and to never ever give up and stop! I love you all for reading!

Have a marvelous day and stay focused on your paths!

Have a great weekend!


Tuesday, July 28, 2009

The Character many people wear it

You ever went to the dealership and saw the car of your dreams. The car looked like everything you've been looking for and you finally purchase it. After you have had it for a couple of months, it turns out to be a piece of junk. This all happens, EVEN THOUGH, it was brand new and looked amazing! Well guess what....Cars are not the only things that can trick us. People do as well. More often so, than we would like.

It really bugs me out when I learn of new people and admire them from a distance at first. Everything that they appear to be about looks great and in alignment with who I am. Then time passes, situations occur, and you get to know the real them and realize they are actually crazy. Literally. Some of these people who seem to have it soooooo together are just a hot flaming mess! There is just no other way to put it.

They might have the career, they might have the money, they may have the fame, but when you get to the know the root of who they are, their character, integrity and everything that they stand for, you realize they are more toxic then taking a bottle of bleach to the head.

This can turn into a sad situation because someone will always continue to get caught up in their trap and get swallowed up by their illusion. These people can turn out to be jealous, selfish, irresponsible, immature, liers, manipulators, thieves, gossipers, back stabbers and the list can go on. But on the exterior boyyyy, they appear to be the best thing since cool air on a muggy summer day.

I have dealt with this many times in my life, and the remedy is simple. Once a person shows you their hand more than once, its your turn to play your cards to give YOU the best possible outcome. Make your moves strategically and precise and in my experience that means taking certain people "in doses" My favorite thing to do.

Sometimes you don't have to cut someone off completely because it could be bad for social success...and that is another blog. But think and know your limits with everyone. You will thank yourself later.

Always remember Character is best seen when they think no one is watching or PAYING ATTENTION!

Have a great Tuesday!

Live limitless!


Thursday, July 23, 2009

Miss Misery just loves her some company!

You ever watched someone sit and destroy another person's character with their tongue. Just strip them of all dignity, admiration and respect because that person "felt" like giving their two cents and they wanted to gossip for gossip's sakes. I have watched so many people sit and do this over and over again, and the worst part of it all is, when that person is in their company again...they will smile, speak to them as if they never said such venomous things to begin with.

I have noticed that I cannot even stay in the same company as people who do this anymore, because they are giving you a glimpse of what they will eventually do to you. Your friendship is contingent on how "good" you are to them. As long as you stay in the parameters of doing what "pleases" them, then you are safe from the destruction as well. Riggghht. But who wants to live like this? Who wants to have weak people surrounding them all the time. The loudest one in the room is the weakest, why have them in your circle anyway, you only are as strong as that weak one.

I have no desire to surround myself with people who are negative, phony, haters, silent haters, spectators, everything that comes out of their mouth is a complaint or they are complaining about someone else. They usually don't even know how ridiculous they are, and you can't tell them anything because they KNOW IT ALL! Such a joke.

Do yourself a favor and listen to your spirit and leave those people right where they stand. They will always have someone who despises their energy around them, and you don't need it rubbing off on you.

Have a great weekend! Smile often and stay positive! :)

Tuesday, July 21, 2009

Are you a spectator or a supporter?

I remember growing up and my family having "get togethers" from time to time. It could be a BBQ, Birthday Party, Holiday Dinner, or a "Lets Entertain just because" type of thing. Of course I would always expect to see my family and very close friends, but there were times when there were folks who would actually come to functions, like birthday parties and baby showers etc., and they would come empty handed and have nothing to ADD on to the festivities.

These people are not just party crashers and don't add on to anything at events, they are people crashers and don't add on to ANYTHING usually at all. They can see you going through something, and they don't even try to give some of themselves to help the situation. They don't try to bring any positive energy and outlook to your life, they rather just sit and watch the way the chips fall. No sort of support or good intentions are ever seen.

Another word that describes these people perfectly are "NOSY". That is all they are really. They just wanna know what it is going on in your life NO MATTER what it is, because there isn't ENOUGH going on in theirs, and once they know what is going on, they will go and discuss with someone one else behind your back.

The sad part is we know who these spectators are in our life. They rarely reach out to us to ask how we are, never offers a helping hand, always empty handed, but always want to have a glimpse into your world. If that glimpse is just watching your social network page, wanting an invitation to something we are having, yet never participate in it, wants to comment and gossip about our moves all the time, only bringing negative energy to your world, why do you let them in? Start padlocking your personal life and space. They want everything easy, and you are a link to them getting what they want. Easy Free entertainment. Spectators need that.

Support those around you genuinely. Everyone can tell when you are half stepping, and just being plain nosy...and it's just corny in 2009!

Be safe! Love, Life Life.



Thursday, July 16, 2009

How is your tomorrow looking?

I had a conversation with someone recently in which the person said to me "Life is really based on all the decisions that you end up making". As the person said this, I was finishing their sentence but then for some reason it really hit me. Whatever I decided to do yesterday and today, will play a part in my today and tomorrows.

It takes a great deal of discipline and commitment for you to get up every single day, analyze and make each move strategic because you have your future in mind. Many will say I do this all the time, but you really don't always. If you did, you would not be speaking to that guy, you would not go there, you would not have done this and the list could go on and on. We take such huge risks on a daily basis and recover from them so effortlessly that we don't even realize it. It is just human for us all to not always think so seriously and hard about what we are about to do and what can come out of our mouths at all times. We forget how crucial this is.

As I always say Life can be whatever you decide to make it. You wanting to frown or smile through it all is totally on you. It will not always be easy, not even for the person who was born with a silver spoon in their mouth. There will always be some sort of obstacle or disadvantage that will not be what you want. It really comes down to your reaction and how you deal with it that makes whatever it is a lesson learned or in a vain.

Our minds are so powerful. You can simply change your way of thinking and change your life. You can choose to think positive about every single occurrence that happens in your world and it can play such a positive effect that you adapt it as a habit.

John Wayne once said:

"Tomorrow is the most important thing in life. Comes into us at midnight very clean. It's perfect when it arrives and puts itself in our hands. It hopes we've learned something from yesterday."

Tuesday, July 7, 2009

What I know for sure....TODAY.

I remember a couple of years ago I picked up this small book by Oprah called "The Top 20 Things that I know for sure". Oprah posed the question to everyone "What do you know for sure"? When you really put thought to this question, it isn't as easy as it seems.

Disqualifying information like your name and address obviously, ask yourself "What do you know for sure".

This got me to thinking about my own 20 things that I know for sure. These change as time and experiences go on, but this is where I am today.

1- No matter how bad today is, tomorrow leaves room for joy and improvement.

2- A smile can be contagious.

3- Paying ANYONE (stranger or friend) and unexpected compliment can do wonders for someone's spirit in a matter of seconds.

4- Money WILL make your life easier, but it is the space that you are in within your life that will prove if the feeling is rewarding.

5- My life is bigger than me. There is a higher power ruling the main stage. I am the starring role.

6- Faith can literally move mountains. It is how much you believe in something that will determine its power in your life.

7- Looking at children in their element is like watching GOD work first hand.

8- It is important that there is absolutely something that you believe in and are willing to die for. This is PASSION.

9- No matter how many times you have been hurt in LOVE, it is SOOO worth it to fall back into it. Never run from Love. Embrace it.

10- A good home cooked meal can sometimes make you feel like you are on top of the world.

11- When you work hard and put everything you have into something, the universe has no choice but to repay you, and the reward is GREAT. Hard work ALWAYS pays off.

12- Loyalty & Trust are hard to come by, no matter who someone is or how close they claim you are to them.

13- If someone shares something with you in confidence...HONOR IT! This can be one of the most amazing things you can do for someone and watch how your relationship will grow.

14- There are some people who will cut you down and think nothing of it. Their role is to be an opportunist and look out only for them. Do not be in denial about this sort of person. They do exist, just be smart.

15- Nothing is never bad enough to give up. Everything happens in time. Love, Career, Family and Passion is discovered when the time is right.

16- Spirituality is the backbone to our existence. Get in tune with yours.

17- We are at our most true when we are doing and acting as if no one is watching.

18- Complaining and SAYING what you want to change will do nothing for the result that you ultimately want. You must DO, and make what you want happen.

19- Nothing feels better in the world than new love.

20- Help someone do something daily. If it is giving directions, a helping hand, advice, affection, or a hug. Make sure that on a daily basis you GIVE in some way to the next person. This is our purpose.

Thursday, July 2, 2009

MEMORIES....don't live like people do....

Sometimes I sit and think about the times I had with her and it makes me smile. She took the best care of me EVER, I miss that. I miss knowing no matter what she would always be there to make sure I was OK...ALWAYS. I sometimes sit and can loose my myself in the memories and when I come out of the long thought, I look to pick up the phone or go visit, but she isn't here anymore.

Such is Life...Death. We live and we move on. I have to remember that, just because she no longer is here..I can still speak out. She hears me. She knows I wish I could just hug her one more time. That is what is unfair in it all. She can take me all in, It is I who is limited from here.

I have my days...where I miss her a whole lot and today is one of those days.
We all have our moments. I think about what she would say, I hear her response to what I just said, I wonder how she would feel if she saw THIS! I know she can see how happy I am. I know she would love every bit of it. She would smile, donning her gold rim on her perfectly straight teeth, and we would split an apple. :)

Death happens. Life continues...We miss, We remember...I love you! R.I.P. NANA!

Light a candle for all your missed loved ones. They appreciate it!


Have a great weekend and EAT MUCH!


Tuesday, June 30, 2009

The universal language of MJ!

How many people have shared their god given gifts and talents with us so much that they can say, they have contributed and added on to the universal language on the entire planet?

Who can actually say that no matter where they go, on any coast, hemisphere, continent, region, everyone knows their name and everyone knows what they have done?

Who can say no matter what age someone is, they can recite something you said word for word and be excited about it. The answer is...not too many. The truth is...only ONE in my lifetime has done this...and now he has passed on to share his greatness amongst another plane....King of Music...Michael Jackson!

When thriller came out I was 4 years old. I remember seeing the music video and being scared out of my mind. I remember feeling a way about it emotionally more than anything. Why was he so sweet to his lady in the beginning of the video, making her smile, protecting her from the other zombies that seem to be trying to attack them as they strolled on their date, only for him to turn around and he be one of the zombies himself. That made me upset for the girl, and I just could not understand that, not to mention that I thought he REALLY was a zombie and was scared out of my mind.

From then on...I fell in love with MJ, like we all did. I had all the posters of him in my room, the dolls, I wore the penny loafers, I came home from school and spoke to the poster over my bed that was of MJ and his brothers, telling them about my day, and how that girl in my class just gets on my nerves! Yes...In my mind MJ was my dearest friend.

I don't think it was anybody who didn't yearn to wear the red leather jacket he looked soooo hott in, in the Beat it video. We all wanted to wear all black leather after seeing BAD and have a couple of our baby hairs slicked down to look as fly as Michael did. Not to mention when he rocked that silver glove...we wanted it too. We all wanted a piece of something that he had, because we watched him make the world LOOSE THEIR MINDS literally.

I watched Asian, Caucasians, Russians, Indians, Blacks, and a variety of other ethnicity's cry and shake and scream as this man would simply walk on a stage. I had never seen attention being commanded like this in my life. It was that sort of power and admiration that made us all respect and pay attention to the artistry that would capture our hearts and make us put him on the throne where he belonged.

Even though, there have been tons of controversies and stories linked to Michael Jackson that tried to be his demise, none of them can ever take away the tremendous talent and creative brilliance that accompanied his craft and his gift. I am blessed beyond words to have been able to live in this lifetime and watch this man transcend music to depths that are unseen. It has been unheard of, even to this day for an album to have sold 26 million copies in the U.S. with a total of 51 million copies worldwide their first album. This man did it.

I believe that it is music, that speaks to our souls while we are here on earth. It is good music that can lift us up when our spirits are beneath the ground. It is music that makes us get up and dance without giving it a second thought. Once that beat and rhythm grabs you...there is no turning back. What you gonna do about it. Michael knew this, and he proved it every time he shared some of his soul with us.

As Michael said in his song Living off the Wall (one of my FAVS), tonight.....

"gotta leave that nine to five upon the shelf
And just enjoy yourself
Groove, let the madness in the music get to you
Life aint so bad at all
If you live it off the wall
Life aint so bad at all (live life off the wall)
Live your life off the wall (live it off the wall)"


Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Art=Creativity=Inspiration=LOVE.. & LOVE... = will you ever know?

Why do we love?

Why do we yearn for it?

It holds us captive to a world that is never seen, never realized, never fully able to reach its potential..OR DOES IT?

How could you love someone sooo much for them not to reciprocate it in the way you gave it to them? How could you sacrifice so much of your life and time to one person for them to walk all over your deposit to their soul?

Then...what happens to the woman who waits for love...for this...invasion of disturbs takes you off your allows you to be are a prisoner to it's wave..but you wanna ride it. Why not? You love the feeling, and if you fall off...then...who care's. You will cross that bridge when it comes...Yes. You are living irresponsibly to a are riding in a Ferrari at 120 miles per hour with no seat belt..that is the feeling.

TRUST...That is what keeps you sitting down. Holding on. FAITH...that is what comforts your worries and reassures your heart that maybe this wont BREAK. It wont crumble into a million small pieces and you feel it in the pit of your stomach each day.

Love is too complicated Avril once said...What does she know...she was a teenager when she sang that song...yet she was right...Why does it have to be soo complicated.

Why does hate and jealousy run free when LOVE is present?

Why can't we all embrace and encourage LOVE?

We should WANT to see each other happy, finding that special mate to end our sentences, kiss our foreheads, wipes our tears, hold our hands, rub our cheeks, whisper in our ears...

LOVE ...DAMN....

When will we understand your intentions?

I don't think we have reached it yet. The world keeps living and we keep going...and LOVE will always be on a mission to grab us once more...before we turn our backs on it for the last time.

"DON'T HURT ME"! I love you...LOVE!

I was inspired to write this through ART. Through watching someone's story unfold, and watching love never reach its full potential! Such is Life.

Have the courage to LOVE again!

Love Responsibly. She didn't deserve for her love to go in vain.....

Thank you Sydney Pollack! *winks*

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

Show me your consistency, and I will tell you what you are worth.

CONSISTENCY! That's the name of the game. I don't care what you relate this to in your,love,spirituality,physical up keep....Being consistent is what will always help you staying ON TOP of your game.

When you think back to school days, the teacher would always say to the students "you are doing half the job by just showing up", the funny thing is, a lot of people would not even come to school everyday ...they could not even remain consistent with coming to school. As we get older and start to hold jobs and careers, some of us don't even remain consistent in getting to work on time, focusing on what we are there to do, and analyzing HOW to get the position or upgrade we want. We lose sight of it all through distractions, (phone, Internet, people, radio etc). Then we start complaining about WHY we have to do this job, and you easily fall into a slump. The part you don't know is that ITS NOTICED by your co-workers and your supervisors when this happens. They can tell when you do not care, and when you are no longer consistent with the reason why you were hired in the first place.

In love and relationships..New Love is always the best feeling in the world. Makes you feel like you are floating on a fluffy cloud every second of your days. You yearn to spend time with that special person, You think of them constantly. Everyday you write love letters in your mind about that special someone, and you send it to their heart and they receive it some way, because you are both sooo connected. Let's say you take it up a notch and marry each other, and after 2 years of bliss, sometimes shorter, you realize, out the blue, the romance stops. The star gazing in each others eyes is non existent. You are looking for escape mechanisms rather than trying to come up with ways to BE around that person. You are no longer consistent in the love that you built, and it now is weakening and you lost a grip on what was the foundation of why you decided to share your life with this person to begin with.

When it comes to our spiritual lives, its easy to get "lazy" and not put all your time and energy into what you committed to do. No matter what your religion is, who you pray to and what you believe in. It is the consistency you have within that relationship with your higher being, that will give you solace and allow you to continue to have a focus and positive energy driving your life. You need to be consistent in your prayers and keeping others in them. Need to be consistent in living right and having thoughts that are aligned with being great. You need to be consistent with the company you keep and making sure it adds on to you in ways that matter for your spirit.

Lastly, our appearance and physical well being is all determined on how consistent we are with the up keep. If you don't eat right, stay active and you treat your physical shell as a non-priority then it will be. This is always the most interesting thing to me with women especially. They complain about how much weight they are gaining, what they need to do. Some will have their plan written down to a tee, with how much calorie in take they need, when they need to go running and to the gym, along with portion control, and then you see this plan in affect for 2 weeks maybe. The next thing you know, you notice their car at the drive-thru, or you see them stretched out on the couch after eating way too late and they are falling asleep.

Then there are the men and women who just don't put any effort into their physical appearance at all anymore because they feel "they good". They let hairs grow in places that they clearly shouldn't (EWWW), they don't wash their hair, they don't shave, they don't "get dressed", they don't care! They are inconsistent with their own physical well being, but remember what we are on the outside is a total reflection on how we feel about ourselves on the inside.

My point is to say...If you have the discipline to remain CONSISTENT in most areas of your life, you would see a change in yourself and your world almost instantly. It works and it is so worth it. Someone special in my life has taught me what it really means to remain consistent ALL THE TIME. He may not know he was teaching me a lesson, but he does every day, I love him for it.

Stay on top of your A game always people. Cross your T's and dot your i's. If you start something ... make sure you finish it. Keep your word and live with integrity.

Make today COUNT!